


ricochet.

by romulus_adhara



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternative realities, Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, Science Fiction, Superpowers, alternative universe, fluff but you have to really look for it, more than one lmao, sad childhoods, time and dimension travel, you'll cry but it ends well I swear
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-06
Updated: 2018-08-06
Packaged: 2019-06-22 19:27:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 23,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15589068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/romulus_adhara/pseuds/romulus_adhara
Summary: At some point, the world had ended, bringing about emptiness and powers nobody can control.Ten wouldn’t care about the man telling him they can bring everything back, but saving the world means touching Taeyong again. So he says yes.It really backfires.





	ricochet.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kakogohuya](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kakogohuya/gifts).



> so. inspired by everything but mainly by starset - ricochet, and their albums transmissions and vessels. I really recommend them btw amazing music.  
> this thing can get confusing but I promise - if you can stick till the end, it'll be totally worth it.  
> [moodboards and snippets](https://twitter.com/romulusadhara/status/1004473767559606273)  
> beta'd by lovely [Likeyouhungthemoon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Likeyouhungthemoon/profile)  
> come yell at me on [twitter ](https://twitter.com/romulusadhara)  
> and like. enjoy?

##  1 Ricochet / Halo

At some point, the world had ended.

It didn't just disappear, though, no. The apocalypse took its time, albeit it was only a mere minute that brought the chaos.

There were three main points that stayed in Ten's mind. That changed everything.

First, there was darkness. Everything, all the electricity, connection, technology, stopped working, and there was nothing. Ten remembers thinking it's too quiet.

Second, there was a loud bang, like something hitting the Earth, not from the outside but from its own core. He fell to the ground, feeling his knees scrape even under the denim of his jeans, and smelling wind. He suddenly felt like there was something coursing through his body, some kind of static, and he started seeing the world in tiny wires and circuits. Ten looked at Taeyong who was laying on the ground beside him, and that's when the third thing happened.

Taeyong's body caught fire from nothing, just went aflame like it was always supposed to. Ten remembers hearing a scream, but it was his own for Taeyong didn't make a sound — just looked at Ten through the flames, his mouth open and his eyes wide. He reached out, and Ten answered, without thinking twice, without wondering what will happen, and that's how he got a huge burn on his forearm.

He looks down on it now, healed with time but still a reminder that the world, indeed, had ended. He sees tiny streams of electricity under his skin, the ones that are now his blood. Feels the power.

Ten stopped feeling heartbroken a long time ago. He doesn't remember the exact date because nobody keeps calendars anymore, but he knows that they were near Chicago at that time. They met Johnny a week later. Probably a week, Ten is not sure.

He can't say the time, but he knows for sure that he gave up moping and trying to get an answer from the skies as to why his life is what it is.

He hasn't touched Taeyong since their last proper date so long ago. Every time he tries to reach out to the person he loves, that person catches fire and whimpers. The fire doesn’t hurt him. The inability to hold Ten’s hand does. It doesn’t happen with anyone else, and for some time it made Ten want to curl up and cry. He can't, though. They can't afford it.

‘What are you thinking about?’ Taeyong's voice is quiet, but Ten knows he's been screaming some time ago. He wants to console him but there's a possibility neither of them will survive a mere hug.

‘Our last date,’ Ten confesses, looking up. The sun isn't what it used to be now, all botched and way too red and way too close, but it still gives Taeyong's features some glow. Ten smiles. ‘I wanted to propose to you.’

Taeyong smiles softly and kneads his hands. There's a ring on his finger and it somehow survived all the fire those hands had created.

‘Yeah, you've told me. I already said yes, remember?’ Taeyong comes closer, and it's the nearest they can get to each other — the distance of two feet, and Ten can already see Taeyong's palms reddening. They both know what will happen if he comes closer, and it breaks Ten every time.

He still smiles.

‘Are they ready to move?’ he asks.

‘Yep.’ Taeyong nods and turns slightly to the left where their— friends, family, team, the other survivors, whatever —are getting ready to walk again. ‘Johnny says we're close.’

‘He's been saying that for weeks.’ Ten runs his hands down his neck, feeling the static in his fingers. He knows Taeyong sees it too because he exhales sharply, almost annoyed. Ten knows he's not mad at him for having the power, he hates the power itself. Ten can relate.

_ I'm positive this time. _

Ten shivers and turns around, frowning.

‘I asked you not to do it,’ he shouts in the direction of Johnny who's lazily lounging on the ground.

Johnny can see people's minds. Literally. He says it looks like a computer scheme to him, and with enough time and concentration, he can read and manipulate it, even live in there.

He also feels them, and that's why they've been walking with a purpose for the first time since it all started. They met Johnny when he tried to steal their food and Taeyong almost fried him before he screamed out that he can help. When they stopped to ask what he meant he said that he knows how to reverse everything that happened to the world.

‘There is a person in Minneapolis. I think it all started with him, and I hope that he can end it. I can feel his mind, and I will bring us to him.’

And now it's been two months, and they still can't find that person. They've been to Minneapolis, but it's all destroyed, and the location Johnny had brought them to didn't have what they were looking for.

It had Yukhei, though. A scared boy that can control the wind, and was on the verge of death when they brought him back. He got mad at them because death is better than existing like this.

Ten still isn't sure that he changed his mind, but he seems better now, happier, especially now that they've met Jungwoo.

Jungwoo can see and affect people's emotions, so Lucas always clings to him. Ten suspects it's got something to do with the way he looks at Jungwoo and not his mood, but as long as everyone is happy, he's not complaining.

Jungwoo can't make Taeyong's powers go away, though, so there's that. Ten tries not to hold a grudge. He just wants to kiss Taeyong at least one more time.

They're nearing some city Ten can't bring himself to remember the name of. They've long abandoned the maps they had because Johnny just leads them.

Taeyong felt wary at first, especially when Johnny refused to back his knowledge up with some proof, but at some point, he finally opened up when he felt safe enough.

‘His name is Mark, and he is the most brilliant man on this planet. They've been working on some new technology. It was supposed to save the Earth from overpopulation, and you know, in a way it did.’

Ten chuckles to himself remembering that. They did an alright job when the experiment went wrong, that's for sure. People are just— gone. And those left are gifted with abilities that will slowly but inevitably destroy them.

Everything is abandoned. For as long as he can see, there are just empty cars and still smoldering buildings. He feels a shiver down his spine like every time he tries to figure out where all the bodies went.

‘He's near, I know that.’ Johnny's voice is frantic, and he speeds up. It worries Ten. He looks at Taeyong and sees the similar expression on his face. They've learned to trust Johnny, but they both know that love can make you do a lot of things, including lying to people that try to help you.

Because if Ten had ever lost Taeyong, he would cross countries and lie to everyone he meets to get him back. He feels dizzy, and he knows the reason.

‘Johnny,’ Ten calls out. Johnny turns around, and his hands are shaking. Ten can smell rotten flesh. He doesn't want to know. His burn itches and his hair is so long he can see the blue that the electricity inside of him gives it. ‘Please, calm down. You're affecting our minds.’

Johnny breathes out in frustration, but it only makes it worse. There's now a ringing in Ten's head and he knows he's not the only one because Taeyong screams out and grabs his head. He falls to his knees on a road covered in black and grey, and Ten suddenly has a déjà-vu because it's how it happened when everything went to shit. He reaches out but can't touch, and it's  _ killing him killing him killing him _ . He wants, he needs, he must touch, and all of a sudden he forgets why he can't.

The world starts to seem so much brighter and lighter, and he takes a step towards Taeyong, and another one, and another until he's kneeling down beside his beloved, taking his face into his hands. There are some funny bright lights playing on Tae's face, and Ten wants to touch them, kiss them. His palms burn but he doesn't mind. It's all fine. While he's with Tae, everything will be fine.

‘I love you,’ he whispers, smiling, but Taeyong isn't smiling back, no, he's screaming, and at first Ten doesn't understand what because everything is quiet and it's like there's water around his head.

Then, he hears buzzing. The same funny lights, but this time blue, are dancing on his skin, and it's amusing.

Taeyong's voice finally reaches him, and his words break Ten's heart.

‘Get away from me.’

It hurts, and he doesn't understand, and he wants to ask, wants to scream, but suddenly he's being ripped away from the man he loves, and it's devastating. He needs to get close again. He smells fire.

‘Oh god, I'm so sorry, Ten, fuck, I didn't mean to, I just got so mad at you for stopping.’ The voice is distantly familiar, but it's not relevant now. He needs to get the hands holding him off and get back to Taeyong. ‘No, wait, Ten, please, just hold still so that I can unwire you.’

No, no, no. No. He thinks he screams but the static is still buzzing, and it's so annoying he wants to claw at his head. He doesn't know who's holding him, and he doesn't want to know — he only sees Taeyong, his sweet, kind Taeyong, laying on the ground and crying. Why is he crying? What is going on? Why does he feel a cage around his brain?

And then, it's dark again. Ten is really starting to hate it.

 

/

 

He wakes up to the sounds of soft singing, and it immediately soothes him. It's Taeyong, of course, it is, and Ten has probably slept through his alarms again, and Tae is trying to wake him up softly. He reaches out to him blindly, but there are a scuffle and a soft curse.

‘Ten, baby, you know we can't touch.’ It's Taeyong but at the same time, not him — his voice is too sad and too raspy.

Ten opens his eyes in worry and remembers. Taeyong had never sung to him.

He wants to scream.

‘What happened?’ He tries not to look at Taeyong, but the only other option is the sky, and it's unnaturally red like it always is these days, so he just closes his eyes.

‘I did,’ comes Johnny's voice, and Ten looks to his right.

The first thing he notices is that Johnny's shirt is charred and burned. He remembers static and remembers Johnny holding him, so that explains it. He hopes it didn't get to Johnny's skin.

A second thing is an unfamiliar man clinging to Johnny and hiding his face in the crook of his neck. His hair is the color of sand, but it doesn't look natural or dyed — it glows.

‘Explain,’ Ten croaks, and rubs his eyes. His fingers are clammy and hurt when he tries to touch his face. Somehow, he can feel Taeyong tensing on his other side although he's probably sitting a few feet away.

‘This is my fault,’ the man in Johnny's arms raises his voice and turns to Ten. His eyes are also gold, and his voice is soft. ‘He saw me and freaked out. Basically fried your instincts, leaving only emotions and deepest wishes. Apparently, your primary urge is to touch that boy.’

There's something strange in the way the man explains it because Ten can actually see it all before his eyes — the tangible pictures in front of him, like movie scenes — Johnny's face in awe, Ten dropping his backpack and going to Taeyong, Taeyong starting to burn but Ten still touching him. He blinks, and images go away.

‘What the hell?’ He wants to squeeze Taeyong's palm to assure himself he's not sleeping but he can't. It's funny how after months he still forgets.

‘I'm Mark,’ the man says, and it suddenly makes sense. Johnny's eyes don't leave Mark's face, but they're sad. ‘And I'm the reason it all happened.’

It's silent, and Ten can finally make himself look at Taeyong.

His face is dirty, but there are clear tear streaks on his cheeks. It makes Ten's throat burn because he is the reason they're there and he can't even wipe them off.

‘Tell him what you told us, Mark,’ Taeyong says, not taking his eyes off Ten. It makes him scared. There's anger in Taeyong's eyes, and some kind of pain Ten doesn't understand.

‘The technology we were working on didn't fail,’ Mark says, voice still so soft, and guilty, his hands clutching Johnny's shirt. ‘It worked perfectly. The only thing wrong is that we weren't supposed to activate it until ten years from now. Someone set it off before the world was prepared. And used it— in a wrong way.’

Ten wants to laugh suddenly because that's what he was joking about — it all worked, the people are gone, and the planet is almost free of them all. He looks at Mark and sees golden streaks on his skin. They look like a flower pattern on his mother's old favorite dress she always wore when he was a child. It's weird.

‘What is your power, Mark?’ he asks softly, He already has a version, but something isn't right with it. ‘What do you control?’

Mark swallows and shudders. Johnny hugs him closer, hiding his face in his hair. Ten feels something burn inside of him. He misses Taeyong's smell.

‘Time.’

It's quiet again, and it's only broken by a loud laugh. Ten finally sits up, wincing when his burned hands touch the ground. He sees Lucas and Jungwoo looking at something in the sand. They seem happy. It seems surreal.

‘How exactly?’ He asks without taking his eyes off two boys.

‘It's subjective. Like Johnny wires into someone's mind to manipulate or detect it. I do the same but I can see and alter their timeline. I can even—’ He breaks off and swallows. The way he looks at Ten is weird, assessing, cautious. ‘I can even transfer other people to other timelines. But there a lot of nuances, and it’s too long to explain.’

Ten raises his eyebrows. The explanation didn’t help, but some part of him learned not to be surprised a long time ago, so it’s fine.

‘Johnny said you can reverse it?’ He says quietly, and there’s a soft sigh. He looks at Taeyong, and there’s some sadness in his eyes, not the kind that’s usually here but something new, like he’s pitying a poor kitten stuck on a tree. It’s unsettling.

‘In a way,’ Mark responds. ‘I can try and stop it from happening.’

He finally untangles from Johnny and comes over to where Ten is sitting on the ground. Only now does he realize that they’re in some kind of tent, so wide he didn’t even notice it at first.

Mark helps him get up, and Ten notices how small the man seems. His eyes, though, seem to be of an old person. They’re not glowing anymore, and he’s guessing it has something to do with his powers.

‘I need to tell you a lot, and I hope you’re in the right state for it.’

His voice is extremely serious, and it’s not that weird considering the world is gone, but Ten doesn’t feel like pointing that out.

‘I don’t think I’ll ever be, but I’m ready to listen.’

 

##  2 It Has Begun / Telepathic

‘Time is extremely subjective,’ Mark says, his hands on his elbows, his body protecting itself from who knows what. ‘So is reality. To make it short — it’s like when you have a certain opinion, and someone has another one, and that creates two realities albeit they exist only for you and that other person. It’s more big on a grand multiverse scale. Every person has their own reality, and that’s on top of those that exist for everyone. You have no idea how vast it is. Nobody does. It’s infinite.’

He comes closer, looking down at his feet. They’re still in the tent. Lucas and Jungwoo had come closer, and now silently listen to Mark talking. Taeyong stands by them, watching over and, like it looks to Ten, taking care. Being ready to hug and help, like a parent. It makes him choke up, but he follows Mark’s gaze on the sand.

‘Every little grain of sand here is a reality. Now imagine the whole world full of it, and it still won’t be enough.’

Ten sighs, rubbing his eyes.

‘That’s very educational, but what does it have to do with us and our world?’

Mark looks him in the eye, something akin to anger appearing on his face.

‘Only fucking everything,’ he grits out, and then closes his eyes, taking a deep breath. ‘I’m trying to explain to you the grand scale, so that you could understand what’s happening with us.’

Johnny comes closer, putting his hand on Mark’s shoulder. It seems to have a soothing effect on him, and after a slight pause, he continues.

‘So. There are a lot of realities, some of them different from others by barely a color of someone’s curtain. There are those that are completely opposite, of course, and those are dangerous for anyone that travels through them.’

Ten takes a stick from the ground, and starts drawing lines on the sand, trying to get used to the fact that there are more people like him, more Tens, and they’re separated only by a thin thread of reality matter.

‘That’s what you do, right?’ He asks, not looking up from his drawing. ‘You’re traveling between them?’

He can hear Mark sighing, and stepping away a little. He’s looking at the horizon, Ten thinks. What does he see there?

‘Yes.’

‘And you’ve been doing it way before the world ended.’

Someone on his side takes a sharp breath, and Ten guesses Jungwoo. He still doesn’t look up. Mark answers in a quiet voice.

‘Yes.’

‘And this world’s Mark is probably long dead, or has never existed at all.’

He doesn’t know how he knows it. Just feels. Sees. Understands.

‘Not really.’

Ten looks up after all and sees Mark piercing him with his golden gaze. Ten’s noticed that his eyes glow when he’s using his ability. What is he looking at?

‘I’m both,’ Mark says. ‘The Mark from here, and the Mark that arrived.’

‘How is it possible?’ Ten frowns. He’s not a great scientist, so it’s hard to try and comprehend the possibility of two minds existing in one body.

Mark laughs.

At first, Ten thinks he imagined it, but no — Mark is actually laughing, holding his stomach and making little chuckling sounds.

‘What’s so funny?’ Ten says, suddenly annoyed. He hates being laughed at, especially when he doesn’t understand the reason.

‘Nothing. Just ironic,’ Mark answers, still smiling. He sighs after a while, and the grim expression comes back on his face. ‘I told you — reality is subjective. I came from the world where my timeline was similar to the one here. With one— difference, but still.’

Ten notices the pause, and it makes him feel even more suspicious. What was the difference? Why didn’t he elaborate? All the questions start to make Ten angry.

‘I kinda have two lives in my head right now, and two sets of memories.’ He points at his forehead. ‘A bit stuffy, but I’m used to it. Usually, I transfer with my own body, but this reality is a special one. It’s one of the most fucked up.’

Ten finishes his drawing and steps away. It’s nothing too fancy, really, just an elaborate scheme of lines and roads, connecting and separating here and there. Mark looks at it and smiles softly. It disappears after a while, and Ten doesn’t get to ask.

‘Is this how you see it?’ He asks, hands still on his elbows, too-long bangs falling over his eyes. ‘Interesting.’

‘Why?’ Ten looks down too, and suddenly feels something akin to déjà-vu. He hasn’t had those in a long time.

‘Nothing. Just figured it would be your first guess,’ Mark says vaguely. ‘Try to explain the way you understand it?’

‘A mess,’ Ten chuckles. ‘A big interconnected mess that keeps expanding. Like I’ve heard about parallel timelines. It’s when something changes, it creates at least one new timeline. And then that one creates more, and more, and it’s like a big tree. Right?’

Mark sighs and grimaces, like he wants to correct Ten, but doesn’t want to offend him.

‘Not exactly, you see, you’re thinking about it slightly wrong.’ Mark pushes the hair out of his eyes, crouches down, and swipes the sand away, destroying the scheme Ten made. ‘It’s not linear, nor like a spider web. If you really want to make it a system, imagine a bunch of— of broken twigs laying on top of each other. They’re interconnected, but they don’t really affect each other if they’re not moved.’

‘That sounds— wrong.’ Ten frowns. Mark looks up, and there’s some enigmatic look in his eyes, like he’s remembering something. Ten is getting tired of the mood constantly changing.

‘Yeah, but that’s why it’s right,’ Mark says quietly, and here it is — a déjà-vu. Ten tilts his head to the side, assessing.

‘Mark, tell, have we ever met in your timeline? Or in this one?’ He looks closely, trying to remember where he could’ve met Mark. ‘I keep getting these feelings— like we’ve talked about this before.’

It’s silent, and Ten feels Taeyong breathing two feet away from him.

‘If you remembered us meeting,’ Mark says, in the same quiet voice, like he’s not hiding their conversation but still wants only Ten to hear it. ‘We wouldn’t have a problem to begin with.’

Ten blinks. Something tells him that wondering what the hell Mark’s talking about would be pointless. He sighs.

‘What problem? The world ending?’ He chuckles.

‘Yes.’ Mark rubs his eyes and takes a breath. It’s like he’s bracing himself for something. ‘The machine malfunctioning isn’t the reason everything went to shit. It’s what set it off to begin with. Or rather someone.’

Lucas comes closer, looking down on the lines on the sand. He moves his hand, and the slight wind breeze destroys the scheme Ten drew up. He smiles.

‘Someone made a mess.’

Mark looks at him closely, his eyes glowing. He blinks, and the light goes away, leaving place for a bewildered expression.

‘Exactly.’

‘What did they do?’ Ten asks, not taking his eyes off Lucas. Jungwoo comes from behind, putting his hands on Lucas’ shoulders. His smile goes away. He folds in on himself and turns to Jungwoo, burying his face in the other's neck.

‘They kicked the pile,’ Mark says. Ten remembers their broken twigs analogy and envisions a cracking sound of wood being thrown around. ‘More so, he broke one of the twigs and disconnected one part of it from the rest. The way he did it broke all of the connections between the parallel universes, and left only a few timelines. Let’s call it a pocket universe.’ Mark makes a motion with his hands, cupping them in a way that closes off the air coming in. ‘Every timeline inside of it is stuck, and the usual laws don’t apply. Like usually when you make a decision, it creates at least two separate timelines, right? But inside this pocket universe, it doesn’t. It’s messing with the laws of the universe, and it’s like an infected wound. If the broken part isn’t destroyed soon, it can spread and affect others.’ He breaks his hands away, and Ten watches, mesmerized, imagining green vapors of infection getting out and contaminating everything around them. ‘There’s no telling what will happen then, but I can promise you it’s going to be bad.’

They’re silent, still looking at the messed up sand at their feet, trying to wrap their heads around everything Mark just said. Somehow, Ten understands it, and with that comprehension comes the realization he doesn’t want to be true.

‘But we’re one of the timelines, right?’ He looks up at Mark, frowning. Mark nods with a grim expression. ‘Then curing this infection will mean killing ourselves?’

Mark sighs and exchanges a look with Johnny. Ten doesn’t like the feeling it gives him; like they’re hiding something vital.

‘There’s a chance it will, yes.’ Mark rubs his eyes. ‘But not necessarily. Best case scenario, we reverse the action that made it all happen, and everything comes back to its rightful place. We won’t even remember this world, as it will cease to exist. It’s not exactly real, anyway, because it doesn’t apply for the usual multiverse. It’s an anomaly. And once we fix it — who knows. Maybe we’ll go back to the places we were the moment everything went to hell. Maybe, we will disappear too.’

He looks at Taeyong, trying to understand what he’s thinking, but Tae’s face is unreadable as he looks back.

‘What do you think?’

Taeyong unfreezes and sighs deeply.

‘We don’t really have a choice, do we?’ He comes over to Lucas who looks like he’s going to be sick and hugs him close. ‘This world isn’t right. I hate it. I’d give anything to get out of it, but even if it were perfect, I’d still think we should fix everything. You heard Mark — it can affect the other universes, where everything is okay, and it just isn’t worth it. The whole universe versus us? I say let it live, not us. Not like this.’

Jungwoo comes from the other side, putting his head on Lucas’ shoulder and closing his eyes.

‘I agree,’ he says quietly. He doesn’t talk much, Ten noticed, but he didn’t have time to figure out whether he’s shy or too smart. ‘I’ll miss you when I don’t exist, but it just isn’t worth it.’

Lucas silently nods, and Ten turns to Johnny and Mark. They look like they’ve already had time to think everything over and make their decisions, and he figures that Mark did, but Johnny didn’t know about this before they found Mark. Does he trust Mark that much or is he hiding something? Ten is sure that he’d have a headache right about now if they hadn’t stopped appearing after he got his powers.

He’s not exactly sure what he wants to do. He doesn’t want to disappear, he doesn’t want to forget Taeyong, and he certainly doesn’t want his world to go away, but do they have a choice? They’re living in a post-apocalyptic world, and sooner or later something will break him — be it the absence of civilization and supplies, or the inability to be with the most important person to him, but something will. He sighs and looks at Taeyong again. He’s already looking back, and there’s something unreadable in his face yet still so painfully familiar he wants to cry. Maybe, he can’t be with his Taeyong, but there are myriads of other Tens that deserve a chance to be with theirs. He turns to Mark.

‘Alright, then, let’s cauterize the wound. Do you have a plan?’

 

##  3 Gravity of You / Into the Unknown

The plan turns out to be Mark doing weird motions with his hands, and them all standing around and watching him like nobody is confused. Johnny probably isn’t, Ten thinks, looking at the man in question stand by Mark with an unbothered face.

‘Mark?’ It’s Jungwoo, his hand holding Lucas, and the other one hooked over Taeyong’s elbow. They’ve known each other for a few weeks but they’re already clinging to each other like it’s their salvation. Maybe, it is. Ten would blame it all on the apocalypse, losing their families, and having only two other people to rely on, but something, some part of him that has known Taeyong since he was thirteen, tells him it’s just Tae’s ability to support people just by being near. He misses and needs it, and he’s happy that at least someone is there to comfort his boyfriend with a touch rather than a distant look. He looks at Taeyong’s bruised hands and takes a tiny step away, just to be sure. Taeyong notices, of course he does, and they both ignore the stinging pain. They’re used to it anyway.

‘Yes?’ Mark answers, not looking up from the part of air he’s doing something to. His eyes are glowing stronger than usual, and the gold patterns on his hands are almost blinding.

‘What are you doing?’ Jungwoo asks, frowning. It gives him a look of innocence, and Ten is reminded that the kid is just nineteen years old.

‘Opening a door.’ Mark’s voice is strong and focused. He swallows, and Ten notices sweat on his forehead. ‘It’s not that easy to navigate realities. Time is easier within one universe but I need to navigate a few of them at the same time, and it’s going to be easier from where we’re going.’

Ten wants to ask and clarify, but Johnny raises his hand, silencing him. Some part of him wants to get irritated, but he doesn’t have time for it because the air between Mark’s glowing hands starts trembling. Ten sees stars and constellations but before he can try and recognize some of them, there’s a loud crack and everything is covered in darkness.

When he opens his eyes, they’re in some kind of room. It seems to be circular because he doesn’t see any corners. Only a few doors. They’re positioned unevenly, scattered through the walls, and the first one he notices is black and cracked.

Something in it makes him come closer. He thinks he can hear voices but there are no words, just murmurs, and something radiating off it, something akin to emotion. It’s a mess of feelings but the strongest Ten feels is pain. The handle of the door looks destroyed by fire but he knows somehow that whatever happened, happened a long time ago, and it’s cold now. The wood on the door, he sees now, is also destroyed by fire. Or electricity? It’s definitely burned and something inside of him urges him to touch the cracks with his fingers. He almost does it, is centimeters away from putting his hand on the door, but someone grabs his arm. He zaps them on instinct and there’s a spark. The person screams out and puts his hand away. Ten turns around — it’s Johnny. He’s rubbing the spot where the electricity got it but he doesn’t seem very bothered.

‘Don’t touch this door,’ he says simply. ‘Stay away from this part of the room altogether.’

He motions to the ceiling with his eyes, and as Ten follows his gaze, he sees a giant crack. It seems there’s nothing inside of it but the longer he looks, the more he sees.

Shapes and outlines, voices and sounds, colors and memories.

‘Is that Vegas?’ Taeyong asks. Ten didn’t notice him coming closer, and he steps away a little on instinct. ‘Look, it’s that casino we went to when we were there. There’s a different name, though.’

Ten strains his eyes and sees it too — colorful golden shapes of a grand building with its name written in sparkling letters. He can’t see the exact name but Taeyong’s right — it’s definitely not the one they were at. Before he can try and distinguish anything, the shape changes and he sees Paris, the Eiffel Tower easily recognizable. But then it changes again, and this time, Ten isn’t sure what city it is.

‘It’s Tokyo,’ Lucas supplies from his other side, his brow furrowed. ‘But it’s different somehow. There are a lot fewer buildings and a lot more nature. It’s weird.’

Mark sighs loudly from behind them, and they all turn to see him standing by a big white door with a triangle-shaped handle.

‘You shouldn’t come too close to that.’ He gestures to the crack. ‘It’s the entrance to the main multiverse that wasn’t affected. What you saw are your timelines that still have a chance to survive.’

Ten steps away, throwing one last glance at the crack. He thinks he sees a dark alleyway and hears a metallic clinking but he’s not sure. The farther he is from it, the less he sees.

‘What about the door?’

Mark sighs and looks away.

‘It’s the one that started it all. The source of infection.’ He turns away then and looks at the white door. ‘Johnny?’

Johnny comes to the center of the room and looks at them. He doesn’t look baffled or taken away, and it further convinces Ten that Johnny knows more than he lets on.

‘All right.’ He clasps his hands together. ‘A little guide to the multiverse travel. Normally, there would be a hundred of rules, but this situation is unique and such bullshit as the butterfly effect doesn’t concern us. Like Mark said, these realities are in stasis. They’re all happening at the same time, and they also already happened.’

Ten sees Taeyong hug himself, his usual gesture when he’s trying to wrap his head around something but doesn’t want others to know. Ten smiles softly. He missed these normal moments.

‘How do you know about all of this?’ Jungwoo asks quietly. ‘I thought you knew no more than we did?’

Johnny and Mark exchange a look, and Ten almost groans in frustration. He knew it.

‘Because he’s also from that timeline,’ he says, watching Johnny’s stone face. ‘Aren’t you?’

‘Yes.’ Johnny nods. ‘But before you ask — I’m unique. There are no other Johnnys.’

Ten looks at Mark. He wants to ask a thousand questions, but right now, only one seems more fitting. If they set everything right, other Tens can find their Taeyongs, yet when Johnny disappears, other Marks won’t find their Johnnys. Because there won’t be any. Mark’s face tells him he’s right.

‘It’s not for certain,’ Mark whispers. They still hear it clearly in the quiet of the room. ‘You have a mind. And every mind can exist, albeit in different forms.’

Johnny is looking at him with unreadable expression. Ten notices something on his hands — a slight tremble that looks way too calculated. He frowns.

‘Why are you unique?’ He asks. Johnny is a human like all of them, he got the power after the world ended, and he’s supposed to exist in different forms.

‘Supposed,’ Johnny says. Right. He reads minds. ‘Even if—’

He cuts himself off, closing his eyes and breathing in deeply.

‘Doesn’t matter.’ He collects himself and looks up again. ‘Sorry I lied to you. There was a purpose, and I was fulfilling it. I travel with Mark, and usually, we don’t get separated. This time there was a glitch, and I arrived a few weeks earlier, a few days after the end. In my original world, I didn't have the mind power. I think your reality has a peculiar perception, but it's just a theory. In any case, yeah, I've been basically lying to you the whole time.’

There’s silence. Ten would expect himself to be mad, but he finds that he isn’t even surprised. Johnny is a weird guy, but he always pulled his weight and helped them survive. Who knows what they all would've thought if he'd showed up and told them about this whole time thing? If Ten were in his place, if he were trying to get to Taeyong, he’d lie too.

‘Whatever.’ It’s Taeyong, and Ten is almost surprised at how in sync they are. He almost forgot. ‘Just tell us those rules that still apply.’

Johnny nods and starts counting on his fingers.

‘First of all, we all transfer in our own bodies and shapes, so don’t jump out on the street or in front of someone. You never know if your counterpart is the one who meets you. We’re being discrete.’

Ten imagines for a second meeting himself and almost scoffs. He’d probably tell that idiot to kiss Taeyong more while he can. He swallows a bitter taste in his mouth.

‘Second,  _ always  _ listen to Mark. He knows more about these things than all of you combined. Even if he asks to do something weird, you still do it, and ask questions later.’ They exchange another look, and Ten sees Mark nodding slightly. ‘Third. You may see things that will make you think you’re losing your minds. But remember that there’s a purpose to everything. And we’re leading you down the necessary path.’

‘Well, that’s not cryptic at all,’ Ten chuckles. ‘Anything else?’

Johnny tilts his head, looking closely.

‘Remarkable,’ he says, but before Ten can ask what he means, Johnny adds, ‘Those are the basic ones, but if something arises along the way, I’ll tell you.’

Ten nods, worrying his lips. He wishes he could get a few seconds alone with Taeyong to discuss it all. He’s learned to survive without constantly checking with Tae, but he still wishes they could talk like normal people. Looking at Taeyong, he sees that the feeling is mutual if the tremble in Taeyong’s clenched fingers and the pleading look in his eyes are anything to go by. If only they could... Instead, they just nod to each other, and Taeyong takes Lucas and Jungwoo by the hand.

‘Lead the way,’ Taeyong says.

Johnny nods and gestures to the door. Mark already has it opened, and it’s all shapes and lights, yet Ten thinks he can distinguish a room behind it.

He sighs and follows them inside.

 

##  4 Telescope / Unbecoming

Blinding light envelopes them when they step into the room, but it dissipates very soon, and Ten sees the familiar shapes and furniture.

‘We’re home,’ Taeyong whispers, tears in his eyes, and Ten truly understands the sentiment.

They’re in their living room, and everything is just how they left it before they went out to the dinner that started the end.

‘Alright.’ Mark claps his hands and stands before them. ‘A little exposition. We’re in my original world, the one that started it all, but before it all went to hell.’

‘Do we know each other in this world?’ Ten asks offhandedly, busy looking at their pictures — they’re different and seem like they were all taken in one place, some kind of hospital, but he’s happy to find that the love in his eyes and the way Taeyong looks at him is still the same in this world. It makes him surprisingly content.

Mark doesn’t answer right away, and it makes Ten turn around and look at him. Mark’s face is closed off and serious, but there’s a twitch to his mouth.

‘You can say so,’ he answers cryptically, and Ten raises his eyebrows. ‘We grew up together.’

There’s silence, and Ten suddenly sees something new in Mark — the sadness in the corner of his eyes, the tired slump of his shoulders, the unsure tremble in his fingers.

‘We’re best friends here,’ Mark says quietly. ‘At least, we used to be before it all went to hell.’

Ten doesn’t answer. He just comes closer and envelops Mark in a hug, feeling something familiar in holding the unfamiliar body.

‘I know I’m not him,’ he murmurs. ‘But I’m sorry you lost him. And I hope we can fix it all.’

Mark hugs him back, chuckling, and Ten feels his shaky breath on his neck. He smiles, feeling another sting of nostalgia. The outlines of some memories flash before his eyes, but they’re gone before he can focus on them.

‘Yeah,’ Mark says. ‘I hope so too.’

 

/

 

‘Do you mind if I use your shower?’ Johnny asks, looking around nervously, his dirty form from the long road and fucked up life standing out in their pristine apartment. Ten had already taken his, and he'd never appreciated hot water so much.

‘Of course.’ Ten shrugs and points to the bathroom. ‘You all can use one. The towels are in the top cabinet in the hallway, and make sure there's no sign you've been there when you're done. We don't want this-world us getting suspicious.’

Mark enters the living room, an orange in his hands and a goofy grin on his face, so unusual it makes Ten uneasy.

‘God, I missed fruits,’ he says, biting into it without minding the juice dripping down his chin.

‘You can thank me for that.’ Taeyong looks up from where he's looking at their pictures near the TV. ‘Ten hates them.’

Mark makes an offended sound, and Ten almost wants to laugh. Almost.

The sight of their home, the one they can return to if they succeed, makes him think about all the times they've walked on this floor, cuddled on the couch, or played the console. It was so easy and so simple — just them, happy, content, unaware of what was to come. It makes him think whether he'll be able to return to this life after what they've been through.

‘Will we remember?’ He turns to Mark, hugging his frame. Being here only reminds him about the times he could still touch his boyfriend, and it hurts. ‘When we turn this whole thing around, and the universe comes back to its course, will we remember what happened in the original timeline?’

Mark stops eating and frowns. His eyes start to glow again, and Ten guesses he's trying to predict it. Ten wishes he knew the answer without using his powers.

‘I can't tell, there are too many versions of this,’ Mark says after a pause. He blinks, and his eyes are back to normal. ‘I guess we'll wait and see.’

Taeyong comes closer, reflectively keeping their usual distance, and tilts his head to the side.

‘You'll miss it? That world?’

Ten wants to smile suddenly because leave it to Taeyong to know Ten's feelings before he figures them out himself. If it weren't for him, they'd have got together about a year later.

‘I'll miss knowing what I can lose,’ Ten answers, and he knows Taeyong will understand. He'll miss appreciating a simple touch of skin when it's prohibited. He'll miss knowing the true worth of their relationship.

Taeyong smiles softly and nods. He turns his head towards their bedroom.

‘I'll get us some old clothes to change into. You need anything, guys?’ He turns to where Lucas and Jungwoo are looking at their video games collection in awe. ‘I think I can find something that will fit you and that This Me won't notice being gone.’

They don't get to answer because in the second of quiet after Taeyong's words, there is a voice in the hallway, and Ten listens on with dread how the keys start turning in the lock.

‘What the hell?’ He moves closer to Taeyong on instinct, trying to see the clock behind him. ‘We're not supposed to be home for hours.’

‘You’re different in this world,’ Mark says urgently. ‘And so are your schedules.’

He grabs Taeyong and drags him towards the bathroom. Lucas and Jungwoo rush in after him, and Ten swallows suddenly feeling nervous.

‘I just looked ahead — it's This Taeyong, and if Ten plays it right, he won't even notice anything. Ten, don’t ask too many questions,’ he whispers urgently, opening the door to the bathroom. Ten can hear running water and see the outlines of Johnny's body through the shower curtain. All the tension aside, he'd really survive without that sight. ‘Johnny, baby, we have a crisis…’

The door closes, and at the same time, Taeyong enters the living room. Ten tries not to react too visibly but it's hard when he's wearing only a pajama he found in the bathroom, and he hadn't seen this Taeyong in months. His hair is green, and Ten remembers them dying it together. It was a bad idea because there was more kissing than styling and the dye was everywhere but he'd still wouldn't trade it for anything.

‘Chai?’ Taeyong stops in his tracks, his hand on the strap of his messenger bag, his lips slightly parted in surprise. He's wearing the same shirt he'd be in when the world ends, and it makes Ten want to shudder. ‘Aren't you supposed to be at work?’

He comes closer, like he always does, because even when he's asking the question, his first instinct upon seeing Ten is to kiss him, and Ten always secretly loved that habit of his, yet now he panics because he doesn't know whether something will happen when they touch.

He doesn't have time to step away, because Tayong is suddenly right before him, putting his hands on his neck and kissing him softly.

It feels like coming home after months of exhausting traveling, and in a way, it is. Ten was afraid he'd forget how amazing it feels to touch Taeyong, but it's all still the same, and the main earth-shattering thing is that nothing happens — his powers don't react, and Taeyong isn't catching fire because he doesn't possess the ability to do so yet.

Ten wants to cry. But instead, he wraps his arms around Taeyong's waist and holds him close enough to feel the lines of his body once again. It's so exhilarating he laughs into the kiss but refuses to break it.

There's a thought in the back of his mind that there is another Taeyong in the bathroom, and he probably knows what's happening, but it doesn't feel wrong. This is still his Tae, his sweet sunshine, and his lips still taste like tea and mint.

‘I love you,’ he whispers as soon as they break apart, and it feels so perfect to say it quietly into Taeyong's skin for the first time since forever. ‘More than anything.’

‘I love you too,’ Taeyong chuckles, frowning. ‘But is everything okay? I could swear I saw you in the lab when I was leaving.’

Ten wants to frown and ask him more but he remembers Mark’s warning and just smiles softly.

‘I just—’ he starts, but there’s literally nothing in his mind. He chuckles. ‘I’m sorry, I’m so intoxicated by you my brain isn’t working.’

Taeyong snorts and kisses him on the nose.

‘Well, anyway, I’m sure Mark is looking for you, so you better head back,’ he says, stepping away and into their bedroom. Ten wants to go after him, yet he can’t move. He just listens to the sounds of the man he loves moving around and existing. It’s exhilarating, the knowledge that there is more than one version of this perfect human. He knows Mark had said it already, but actually witnessing it is a completely different, surreal thing.

‘I actually came back for this.’ Taeyong steps out of the room, holding a leather notebook, ragged and worn yet obviously cared for, and something in the doodles on its cover rings familiar to Ten. ‘Mark said that if you came to the room A and didn’t find this, you’d freak. He’s not wrong.’

Ten feels like he’s slowly backing down into a corner but he truly doesn’t know what to say that won’t make Taeyong suspicious and, in addition, makes him leave to the mysterious lab alone and without dragging Ten with him.

‘Yeah,’ he chuckles. ‘Better take it with you.’

He looks at the cover and sees, among the different scribbles, a phrase.  _ ‘Project Limitless _ .’

‘You’re not coming back?’ Taeyong frowns.

‘I need to take care of some stuff beforehand,’ Ten lies desperately, hoping that this Taeyong trusts his Ten just as much as his Taeyong trusts him, and won’t question this weird excuse.

‘You’re weird today,’ Taeyong notes, but there’s no suspicion in his voice. He comes closer and pecks Ten on the lips. ‘But then again, you always are. See you, baby.’

Ten doesn’t let him leave just yet. He hugs him by the waist and puts his hand on Taeyong’s neck, bringing him closer and kissing him once again, trying to convey just how much he truly loves and misses him. Taeyong’s lips are soft, and he tastes just the same, and Ten never wants to let go. He strokes his chin when they part to feel once again how nothing happens, to not see the flames appearing, to not hurt him.

‘I love you. Always,’ he whispers. ‘And I’ll see you soon.’

Taeyong is breathless a bit, and there is a question in his eyes, but he doesn’t press — just leaves with a smile and the leather book.

Ten doesn’t know for how long he’s been standing there watching the closed door when he feels the others leaving the bathroom. For some reason, he desperately wants to apologize to Taeyong, but he can’t find the words. The look Tae is giving him when he looks up tells him that they’ve heard everything.

‘I—’ he starts, but Taeyong raises his hand. There’s no anger or judgment on his face, just sadness.

‘Don’t. It’s okay,’ he says quietly and smiles.

Mark is rubbing his face and murmuring something into his hands.

‘We have to go.’

It’s Johnny now, his voice urgent and his face panicky. He’s wearing Ten’s old clothes, and his hair is still wet from the shower.

‘No, we need to, we need to look further,’ Mark contradicts, his voice frantic.

‘Fuck, Mark, he’s coming, don’t you feel it?’ Johnny comes closer to him, grabbing his hands and pulling them away.

What Ten sees makes him step back a little. This time not just his eyes, but his whole face is glowing, his veins highlighted with gold.

‘I know,’ he whispers. ‘I know. I want to meet him. What if I can— what if he sees—’

‘Sees what?’ Johnny shouts and points his hand at Ten. ‘This? It didn’t work once, it won’t work again. Stop trying to justify him.’

Mark’s face scrunches up and Ten fears he’ll start crying. The man shakes his head but starts opening the entrance to the Room nevertheless.

‘If only I could—’ he whispers. His voice rings all around them. Ten sees the air shift and the home he loves so much start to disappear.

‘You can’t,’ Johnny answers quietly, and it’s the last thing Ten hears before everything goes dark.

 

##  5 Point of No Return / Rise and Fall

‘Fuck!’ Is the first thing Ten hears when he opens his eyes in the Room. He thinks he heard a sound of door shutting loudly but when he looks around everything seems normal.

‘We barely missed him,’ Johnny seethes, his palms rubbing his eyes. ‘How the fuck can he travel through here?’

‘I don’t think he did,’ Mark swallows. His face is still glowing, but now it’s not so creepy. ‘I think he saw me leaving the apartment and tried to follow, but the Room kicked him out because it’s not his Doorway.’

‘Just splendid,’ Johnny spits out, chuckling. ‘I told you we should’ve left earlier. I fucking told you.’

‘I know what you told me!’ Mark suddenly screams, and Ten takes a step back, suddenly afraid of the small man. ‘But fucking sue me for still believing he can change. He’s a good fucking person, Johnny, and just because you came along when he started getting angrier, doesn’t mean he was always this way. I will never, you hear me,  _ never  _ give up on him.’

There’s tense silence, and Ten keeps looking between Johnny and Mark, both of them breathing heavily and drilling each other with their gazes. Who are they talking about? Who is this mysterious person that messed up the whole universe but still has Mark’s trust? Ten thinks about what Mark said about them being best friends in the original timeline. Does Ten know their villain, too? Would he stand on Mark’s side, or Johnny’s, if he knew everything to its fullest? Curious.

‘As you wish, Doctor,’ Johnny whispers, and Mark winces, stepping closer.

‘Please, don’t do this, sunshine,’ he pleads but Johnny turns away and goes to the blackest door with the crack above it.

‘It’s getting wider,’ he says, observing the ceiling. Mark is looking at him with a sad expression. ‘We need to hurry.’

‘Can somebody explain what’s going on?’ Taeyong wonders from where he’s still standing by the white door, looking at it curiously.

‘I didn’t anticipate something,’ Mark says quietly. ‘And it compromised this entire mission.’

‘Nah, that’s bullshit,’ Johnny snorts. ‘You knew exactly what you were doing.’

‘In any case,’ Mark speaks up, his voice gaining more confidence by the word. ‘We almost bumped into the man who started it all.’

‘Why did we run, then?’ Ten frowns. ‘Maybe, we could’ve talked to him.’

‘Don’t you think we tried?’ Johnny snaps. ‘He’s a man possessed. There’s no reasoning with him, no compromise. He started spiraling a long time ago, and he hasn’t been able to stop.’

‘What’s his goal?’ Jungwoo asks. Ten feels the angry mood shifting and the more calm one envelop them all. He appreciates the boy trying to help.

‘Fix what he did.’ Mark shrugs, hugging himself. ‘He made a mistake, and he’s trying to reverse it. But his problem is that he only looks at it all from his angle, a selfish one, and not from the angle of billions of world being in danger.’

‘He sounds like a dickhead.’ Ten curves his eyebrow. Johnny laughs.

‘You wouldn’t believe.’

Mark sighs and moves to the next door. This one is maroon, with an exquisite handle and the traces of deep red light coming from the barely visible cracks in the wood.

‘Alright,’ he says and starts tracing his hands over the door. ‘We’re going back to your world, but earlier. To the time of the accident.’

‘Why didn’t we go there in the first place?’ Ten wonders. ‘We can stop it, right?’

‘No, we—’ Mark closes his eyes. ‘Johnny and I are already there. We tried to fix it once before, and it didn’t help, so us coming there again will only make the matters worse. Besides, we did something irreversible, and messing with it now will only fuck this up beyond fixing.’

‘Why are we going there now?’ Lucas tilts his head.

‘To reflect.’

Mark doesn’t say anything else. He sighs and opens the door, and Ten sees red sky and hears tears.

 

##  6 My Demons / Back to the Earth

When they open their eyes, it’s dark.

At least, that’s what it seems like at first, but Ten blinks a couple of times and sees it — a grand laboratory corridor that looks almost abandoned. The lights are flickering on and off, and he thinks he can hear distant screaming.

‘It’s starting,’ Johnny says grimly from his right and leads them along the row of doors until they reach the one labeled  _ ‘Observatory’ _ . There’s a table attached to the wall, and Ten barely gets to read the words  _ ‘Project Limitless’ _ before they’re all being dragged into a small dark room.

‘Hey,’ Ten calls out even though it’s pitch-black in here. ‘I’ve seen the name before.  _ Project Limitless _ . What’s that?’

‘Just a work of my whole life,’ comes a quiet response from Mark somewhere from the left. ‘Please, keep silent.’

Before he can wonder what Mark means, the light comes on, and Ten looks around, observing a small room with no tables or chairs and one window — that is currently showing Mark and Johnny in some high-tech looking lab.

Ten’s eyes widen, and he barely remembers Mark’s words about staying silent. He turns to his left — both Mark and Johnny are here. He knew there's a possibility of seeing different versions of one person, but it's still surreal.

‘Won’t they see us?’ Taeyong asks, coming closer to the glass and putting his hand there.

‘It’s a two-way mirror,’ Johnny explains, his hands in his pockets, his face unreadable. ‘Explain, Doctor.’

Mark flinches and sighs, rubbing his eyes.

‘We need to wait until everybody is gone from the room,’ he explains. ‘I need to take some documents, and the shit is about to majorly go down, so please, just— just observe.’

Ten looks over at where Taeyong, Lucas, and Jungwoo are huddled together, ready to watch the scene unravel. Something doesn’t sit right with him.

‘Babe?’ He calls out, suddenly nervous. Taeyong turns to him and smiles. ‘I don’t feel so good.’

‘It’s okay, love,’ Taeyong whispers. ‘Let’s just watch.’

Ten breathes in through his nose and nods. His head starts to spin. He looks over to the lab and watches Mark and Johnny’s agitated faces.

‘Can he fucking calm down already?!’ Johnny screams, putting some numbers into the monitors. ‘He’s destroying everything, can’t he see?’

‘Listen,’ Mark exclaims, taking Johnny’s hands in his and looking him in the eye. ‘There’s no point by now. He’s coming. We just need to stop him here and explain everything, and maybe—’

‘What?’ Johnny shouts so loudly that Ten flinches. ‘Maybe what? Turn it all around? You know damn well it’s irreversible. Our only choice is to stop him while he’s inside.’

‘He’ll be stuck,’ Mark whispers, his voice so broken and sorrowful it hurts. ‘He’ll be in the nothing. He’ll become nothing.’

‘Well,’ Johnny breathes out angrily. ‘Maybe, that’s what he deserves.’

Mark steps away and shakes his head frantically. He starts typing into the same monitor Johnny did, trying to cancel out the equation.

‘No,’ he whispers again and again. ‘No. He’ll see. I’ll make him see.’

‘When will you stop justifying him?’ Johnny asks.

Only now Ten notices a big machine that looks like an entryway with a glass over it. It starts glowing, and about a dozen of cracks appear along its surface.

‘Never,’ Mark answers. ‘He’s a good person, Johnny, you know it, he’s just confused and in pain.’

Johnny starts laughing, and at first Ten can’t believe his eyes, but it’s true — he chuckles loudly, his head thrown back.

‘You’re an idiot,’ he says, and at this Mark’s head snaps, his eyes glowing.

‘And you’re just a fucking machine,’ he spits out, and it’s obvious he regrets it as soon as it leaves his mouth by the way his eyes widen and go back to their soft brown color.

Ten looks to his right to where this-Johnny’s face is unreadable as he looks at the floor. A machine?

‘Shit, I’m sorry, I just—’ Mark starts, but Johnny cuts him off by pushing him away from the console.

‘You just voiced your thoughts,’ he cuts off. ‘And now the machine will show you that you’re not the only one knowing the price of love.’

He starts typing so rapidly that his hands are almost invisible. Mark goes to stop him, but it’s too late — the glass behind them breaks with a loud crash, and a person falls in. Their face and body are covered by a heavy black cloth, and they’re breathing heavily.

‘Fucking finally,’ they say, and their voice is deep and distorted — like someone is trying to speak through a bad radio.

Ten sees Taeyong touch the glass in the corner of his eye, but he’s too focused on trying to distinguish the man’s features. Maybe, he knows him. Maybe, he’s met him in his world. It would help him understand.

‘Hey-a, boys,’ the man speaks up and comes up to the console. ‘When are we?’

‘Please, stop.’ Mark steps between the man and the monitor, trying to reason with him. ‘We can still fix it.’

‘That’s what I’m doing, Markie,’ the man chuckles. ‘Now, please, kindly step away.’

‘No.’ It’s Johnny now, his hands still flying over the screen.

‘What are you doing?’ The man wonders, his brow furrowed. Only his eyes are visible from under the mask but it’s too little to recognize him by.

‘Untangling the mess you made,’ Johnny answers. The machine start whirling, making loud sounds.

‘No,’ the man whispers. ‘You fucking—’

‘Wait,’ Mark stops him before he can grab the back of Johnny’s shirt. ‘It’s not worth it, please, it’s not worth it.’

‘Oh, but it is,’ the man whispers frantically and pushes Mark away.

It’s too late, though — there’s a sound akin to explosion and it reminds Ten of the night it all ended. All the lights go out, but something in the room illuminates it — the man in the mask is glowing softly, emitting blue light.

Suddenly, the door opens, and Ten feels even more dizzy — another Mark runs in, his face in panic.

‘What the—’ he starts upon seeing the people inside but it’s all he has the time to say — Johnny presses on his neck, and he passes out. Johnny catches him before he hits the floor and gently puts him on the table near the mirror. He comes so close that Ten can see his eyes — and they’re glowing too, but unlike Mark’s, they’re electric, like there are thousands of wires inside of the irises.

Johnny brushes a strand of hair from Mark’s forehead and steps away.

‘Did you really think that a simple blackout will stop me?’ The man chuckles and goes to the door, but the machine is getting louder again.

‘No,’ Johnny whispers. ‘It’s what comes next.’

Everything happens really fast after that — Ten hears a distorted scream followed by another explosion, this one so strong it shakes the building and makes them all fall down.

But, they don’t even hit the floor — he hears a cracking sound and there’s darkness. The last thing he hears is a sob. He thinks it’s his own.

##  7 Carnivore / Everglow

‘What the hell was that?’ Lucas whispers as soon as they’re all awake in the Room again.

‘The end of the world,’ Johnny grits out.

Ten rubs his head and looks at Taeyong.

‘Are you okay?’ He asks, concerned about how pale Tae looks.

‘Relatively.’ Taeyong smiles and goes to check up on Jungwoo who’s curled down on the floor.

Ten sighs, cursing for what must be a millionth time, his inability to comfort his boyfriend, and turns to Mark, who’s leaning his forehead on the maroon door.

‘Explain.’ His voice is stern, because he’s getting tired. Of what — he doesn’t really understand, but it’s nagging at him, pulling at his mind, desperate to get out of his subconscious and become a solid thought.

‘You saw everything, what’s left to explain?’ He says tiredly, and it makes Ten mad.

To his surprise, there’s a hand on his shoulder and a soft voice.

‘I tried to kill him,’ Johnny says. ‘To literally destroy his every atom. But he went through before the machine finished calculating. It backfired because the rift was open — two Marks became one person. I got sent to Chicago. He came back into the Doorway — his version of this Room. I tried to disintegrate him, but... I was the only one able to do it, seeing as my mind is fast enough to cook up such a formula, and— and since I don’t have the heart to feel remorse.’

‘No,’ Mark snaps, turning around. It’s even worse now — his neck now is also covered in golden veins. His teeth are bared and there are golden tear streaks down his cheeks. ‘I already said I’m sorry. I know you’re more than just what I programmed you to be.’

‘Programmed?’ Ten whispers. It makes sense, suddenly — the way Johnny’s every move seems to be calibrated, his words about existing in only one universe, and the way his hands flew over the console.

‘He’s an AI,’ Mark grits out. ‘But a more evolved and human version of it. We needed something that would perform our calculations fast enough for the machine to work, and I designed him. We built him out of the mind and body of a dying man, and Ten always saw Johnny as a useful tool, not the human I could love.’

Ten frowns, silently judging his counterpart. He knows Johnny, and he knows he’s as human as they all are, and if it weren’t for him, they probably wouldn’t have survived long enough to be here.

But, what if that Ten had his reasons? Why was he so cold? He had his Taeyong, so he’s supposed to have been happy, yet...

‘I’m sorry.’ He frowns. ‘I know I’m not him, but I’m sorry he never treated you like you deserve, Johnny. You’re a good friend and a good person.’

Johnny gives him a tiny smile and nods.

‘Thank you,’ he whispers and puts his hand on Mark’s shoulder. ‘I don’t want to fight you. I’m sorry.’

Mark nods and comes closer, burying his face in Johnny’s neck. Ten swallows. He envies them, yet he’s happy they can still be there for each other. Seeing them being so comforted by each other’s presence — it reminds him of his original thoughts about their plan. Even if there’s a possibility that Johnny won’t exist in other universes, they still have to try. What’s the point in giving up before you even try? They have nothing else to do. Might as well try and save the universe.

‘You never took those files you needed,’ Jungwoo calls out suddenly. He’s up now, but his skin is still pale.

‘Oh,’ Mark opens his mouth comically. ‘I guess I didn’t need them that bad.’

Jungwoo purses his lips and tilts his head. Ten can bet anything he’s reading Mark’s emotions. There’s a beat of silence, and he huffs. Whatever he saw inside Mark’s soul must have satisfied him because he shrugs and turns to Lucas, engaging him in a quiet conversation.

Mark breathes out and turns back to Johnny.

‘I know you don’t want to talk about it but I promise you — he’s redeemable. He’s good.’

Johnny sighs and strokes his cheek.

‘He was ready to kill us both to get what he wanted,’ he sighs but cuts Mark off before he can argue. ‘And I know you believe he would’ve stopped. And maybe, I believe it too. But now we have more pressing matters.’

‘Who was he?’ Taeyong suddenly asks, his face closed off. Ten frowns.

‘What?’ Mark asks, his skin still slightly illuminated.

‘Who was the man in the mask?’ He repeats again. He’s not looking at them — his gaze is glued to the charred door. ‘What was wrong with his voice?’

‘He jumped through too many universes.’ Mark shrugs. Ten notices how he omits the first question and frowns. Whom is Mark protecting? Whom is he still justifying even after the man infected the multiverse? Who can be so dear to him? 

‘His body can’t catch up to him, and he has a special power that... at this point, I honestly think it consumed him beyond repair.’

‘Interesting,’ Taeyong says absentmindedly, and Ten tilts his head, frowning. Why is it interesting? ‘He was glowing blue, you know. And his laugh...’

He trails off without finishing his sentence, and Ten is more confused than before. Ah, how he wishes they could get alone and finally talk, but alas — it’s hard to have some privacy when you can’t approach each other. He swallows. He feels helpless without Tae. He doesn’t know how he feels about that.

‘Ten.’ It’s Mark, his jaw set and his face dead serious. ‘I want you to do something for me. I see now that I’ve made a mistake somewhere, so I need you to help me— sort of fix it.’

‘Will it help our goal?’ He wonders.

‘It will—’ Mark looks at Johnny who nods. Ten feels dizzy. Is Johnny reading his mind? ‘It will help you.’

‘Me?’ He chuckles. ‘Well, if you feel it’s necessary.’

‘I do.’ Mark nods, but Ten doubts someone in the room believes him.

‘Sure,’ he drawls out. ‘What do you need from me?’

Mark sighs a few times like he’s psyching up for something. He looks up, his eyes glowing.

‘I need you to go inside that door,’ he says gravely and points to the charred black one which Johnny forbade even going close to.

‘Seriously?’ He says, bewildered. ‘But what about the danger and all that shit?’

Mark goes to the door and beckons him. ‘I have a theory that there are only two things left in there — a room and another door. I need you to go inside, see what’s in the room, and enter the door when you’re ready. When you want to come back, just call for me in your mind, I’ll pull you out.’

‘Wait.’ Taeyong crosses the distance between them, his fists clenched and his face agitated. ‘Are you seriously sending him in there alone? To this mysterious dimension even you’re not sure about? No.’

‘It can only fit one,’ Mark says tiredly.

‘Then I’ll go.’ Taeyong shrugs, and Ten goes to interrupt him, but Mark is faster.

‘It’ll only let Ten in.’

Everyone is silent, including Lucas and Jungwoo, who are now next to them, observing with matching confused expressions.

‘Why so?’ Ten tilts his head. Something is surfacing at the back of his mind, but he’s too occupied to give it attention.

‘I hope you’ll figure it out yourself.’ Mark flinches.

‘That’s some bullshit,’ Taeyong chuckles darkly.

‘Listen, you saw what happened there,’ Mark almost screams, his trembling hand pointing to the maroon door. ‘You heard him. You said it yourself just now.’

Ten wants to scream in frustration because Mark’s words suddenly sedate Taeyong, and he steps away, his jaw set. What did he say? He quickly goes through everything that’s been mentioned after they got back from the end of the world but the whole Johnny reveal is the only thing standing out in his mind. Taeyong goes to Jungwoo, taking his hand and resting his forehead on the boy’s shoulder. Jungwoo starts stroking his fingers, and the part of Ten that still remembers whom in this room he loves the most, hopes that Jungwoo is gifting him with calmness of mind.

‘I’ve been going about it wrong,’ Mark whispers, looking at the black door. ‘Maybe, you just need to see.’

Ten sighs loudly and goes for the door. He’s tired of being confused and feeling like everybody is keeping secrets from him.

‘Farewell,’ he throws over his shoulder and takes the handle.

Somehow, he was expecting it to be hot but it’s cold to the touch. He feels buzzing and realizes suddenly why he’s the only one being able to come through — the door is charged. It wasn’t destroyed by fire, it was wrecked by electricity. His power.

Something suddenly appears right in front of his mind’s eye, and he chuckles.

_ Of course _ .

He opens the door.

 

##  8 Bringing It Down / Down With the Fallen

It’s dark.

No.

It’s nothing.

Yes, that’s more correct — he’s surrounded by the endless emptiness. He’s standing but doesn’t feel the solid floor under his feet. He wants to move but he’s afraid that he’ll trip or fall from some cliff so he stands deathly still, trying to figure out what to do next. He smells bitter burning.

Suddenly, there’s a barely-there whimper.

He already knows who is crying so desperately, has his suspicions, but it seems way too unreal, and he needs to check, he needs to be absolutely sure, he needs to make himself believe.

_ ‘Taeyong _ .’

He knows that broken voice, and he knows the name, and he closes his eyes and exhales, realizing he was right. It’s devastating.

‘Not exactly, sorry,’ he answers quietly, trying to determine where the croaked voice is coming from.

Yet there’s no need — he hears slight buzzing and a blue point of light appears before him. He takes a small step towards it and kneels before a devastated and battered version of himself.

His counterpart looks extremely awful. It’s hard to determine for how long he’s been here — his clothes are ragged and charred, his face pale and dirty, yet his hair is short and— illuminated. With blue light.

He thinks back to the lab, and to the man in the mask who talked funny and had glowing skin, and tries to realize how stupid he could be to not recognize himself.

‘He used to sing to me every morning,’ Chai sobs, burying his hands in his face.

‘You fucked up, buddy,’ Ten whispers gently, carefully taking the man by the chin. His hands fall away and Ten looks into his eyes. They’re red and puffy, and his irises are completely neon blue.

‘We did,’ he croaks, voice distorted. ‘We did, Chai.’

He closes his eyes, because of course he’d know how Taeyong loves to call them, and it hurts so bad he wants to scream in agony and run away. Instead, he takes a deep steadying breath, just like Taeyong had taught him once when he got his first ever panic attack.

‘Nobody will tell me what happened,’ he whispers. ‘Please, explain.’

‘I just wanted to bring him back,’ Chai sobs, and Ten is slightly disgusted.

‘Taeyong?’ He wonders nevertheless.

There’s a choked laugh, and Chai coughs so hard it shakes his whole body. Ten experts to see blood on his lips, yet there’s nothing. It makes him wonder if Chai is even alive, if he’s a breathing body, or if he’s just a remnant of a distant memory, preserved here thanks to his guilt and desperation.

‘Of course, who else? I was so obsessed with him,’ he says quietly and sniffs. He’s so charged with electricity that Ten is sure — if he didn’t possess the same power, he’d be long dead. ‘I couldn’t see that he walked away because I made him do it.’

Ten frowns and takes Chai’s hand.

‘You have the same power,’ he muses. ‘So I have it in more than one universe.’

Chai grips his hand so hard there’s static flying around, and looks into his eyes, and it’s terrifying.

‘Oh, but you don’t,’ he whispers but Ten hears it everywhere, echoing through the space they’re in and inside his mind. ‘You should’ve chosen... you should’ve...’

He can’t finish his desperate thought — Ten sees electricity envelop his entire body, cursing through this veins and setting on fire whatever clothes he still has left. Ten jerks back just in time to avoid the explosion of sparks.

When he opens his eyes, Chai is gone like he was never here, and there’s a door now in his place. Just a spirit, then.

He looks up. A simple white door with an oval handle. It seems to be emitting something so soothing and alluring that Ten immediately wants to enter.

He hesitates. What should he have chosen? He never faced the situations his counterparts seem to get themselves into. Why is he the one having to do something when it’s someone else who fucked up? Granted, he doesn’t know what he would've done, be he in Chai’s place, but... it’s not his fault. It’s not. Why should he be responsible for their sins? Is he only the person he is in his universe, or does he carry some kind of moral responsibility to right the wrongs of other Tens?

He sighs and contemplates calling for Mark to get him out. Maybe, he doesn’t need to know what’s behind that door. Maybe, he should just let it all unravel and leave it to Mark to untangle the mess his best friend has made. And yes, Ten is that best friend, but he’s from another world.

He realizes he never asked how Chai ended up here and what happened to him when he was thrown out of the labs. Mark probably knows. Ten laughs to himself. Mark probably knows everything. That cryptic asshole.

He sighs and looks up. The door is alluring, it’s calling for him, and truly, what other choice does he have? Might as well find out what’s behind it.

He stands up and braces himself. From what he’s already observed, there’s probably another shitshow inside.

Ten shrugs and opens the door, coming inside the enveloping space of white light.

At first, it’s hard to see something but as soon as his eyes adjust to the blinding whiteness, he sees himself in the big lab, not too different from the one he saw his other version go batshit in. This one, though, is well-lit and white, and looks like a pristine working space, not the place where the end of the world has the potential to occur.

There’s a chuckle behind him, and he turns around abruptly, all the rules Johnny had told him about going through his mind at rapid speed.

When he sees who’s standing before him, he feels an overpowering urge to scoff at the concept of déjà-vu.

‘So I’ve succeeded,’ another him says, his head tilted, the eyes behind the glasses curious. He’s dressed in a clean white lab coat and his hair is messed up like he tends to ruffle it often. ‘I have to admit that I’m proud of myself.’

‘What?’ Ten breathes out, still trying to figure out how to act.

‘I’ve figured out how to travel between realities,’ his counterpart says, smiling blindly, completely unfazed by the fact that his exact clone is standing in front of him. ‘But hey, no spoilers! I’m still trying to figure it out on my end.’

Ten can’t help it, he repeats:

‘What?’

The scientists frowns with a slight smile and comes closer. There’s a leather notebook in his hands. Ten remembers seeing it with Taeyong, and just like last time, there’s an inscription on the cover —  _ Project Limitless _ .

‘Are you okay? Was the travel uncomfortable?’ His clone wonders, his head tilted to the side. ‘Can I offer you a hot beverage?’

‘Vodka?’ Ten wonders absentmindedly, and the other man laughs.

‘I have that, actually, but I’m going to go out on a limb here and theorize that it’s not safe to get drunk when you’re dimension-traveling.’ He goes into a small adjoining room. ‘I’ll bring you out some tea, though. You can call me Lee, by the way.’

‘Sure, Lee,’ Ten whispers, thinking that if he keeps meeting himself from different worlds, he’ll run out of nicknames and abbreviations soon.

He looks around. There are schemes and equation everywhere, and dozens upon dozens journals, all filled with writings. He wonders if Lee from this world will also become so obsessed with his project that it drives him mad. He remembers Chai’s words. ‘ _ I wanted to bring him back _ .’ He was most probably talking about Taeyong, because Ten gets it — he truly does. He would cross the universe in a heartbeat if he needed to get to his Tae. But what made Chai’s Taeyong leave in the first place? Was he taken away, or did he deliberately walk away? Does either option give Chai’s madness any justification?

Fuck. The more he travels, the more questions he has. It’s a relief his head stopped hurting when he got his powers.

Lee emerges from the small room with a tray. There are cups, a kettle, and even some biscuits. It reminds Ten of Taeyong. He looks at Lee’s fingers — no ring. Maybe, he didn’t propose yet? Or, maybe...

‘Do you have Taeyong?’ He wonders quietly, and Lee looks up at him, puzzled.

‘Who’s that?’ He chuckles, and Ten feels like someone punched him in the gut with a hot metal pipe.

‘Taeyong,’ he repeats, unwilling to believe that in some worlds he never met his boy. He knows it’s only logical, because even if there is a fixed point in the universe, it’s certainly not his relationship, but he’d expect Lee to at least have Tae in his life. Not necessarily love. Just know him.

‘I—’ Lee makes a pause and frowns. ‘I think there was a kid named like this in my school, but I haven’t seen him since graduation. Why?’

Ten wants to laugh, and he does — he’s too exhausted to hold back. He’s so fucking relieved that at least something is stable.

‘You might wanna ring him up,’ he says, smiling. ‘Trust me, one cup of coffee won’t hurt anyone.’

Lee chuckles.

‘I don’t think I have time for this now, you know,’ he gestures to all the calculations in the room. ‘I’m kinda busy with the project of my life.’

‘Aren’t you lonely?’ Ten wonders before he can stop himself.

‘Not really?’ Lee answers, his voice unsure but not because he isn’t confident in his answer, more because he isn’t sure it’s what Ten wants to hear. ‘I have my work. It’s exciting.’

‘Yeah, but don’t you want something more?’

‘I don’t think I can handle something more,’ Lee laughs. ‘I don’t want to bite off more than I can chew, you know.’

Ten thinks about Chai.

‘Yeah, I know,’ he whispers.

Lee seems happy. He doesn’t have Taeyong but he has  _ Limitless _ . Would it be so terrible for Chai to be the same? Choose his work over his relationship? Of course, for Lee the necessity to make that choice never happened but nevertheless.

Nevertheless.

Is life just work? Is it just love? Is it something else? Is it one thing, or a big jigsaw puzzle, comprised of thousands small things?

He’d never considered himself an unhappy man, but his life got so much brighter when Taeyong came along that it seems impossible to imagine it without him. But is it because his life has always meant to have Taeyong in him, or because he fell in love so hard that he’s convinced himself that it doesn’t make sense otherwise?

Why is he analyzing himself, if Chai was the one who fucked up?

Perhaps, they’re more alike than he thought.

‘Ten?’ Lee calls out, and Ten blinks, focusing on him. ‘Are you okay?’

‘Yeah,’ he lies. ‘I have to go now.’

‘So soon?’ Lee pouts and sighs. ‘I thought you’d say something useful to me.’

Ten looks at him and wonders if it’ll help if he tells Lee to stop building the machine. He thinks about Chai again. Chai’s Taeyong. Puts his faith in Lee’s Taeyong. Smiles.

‘Get that coffee date,’ he whispers and steps away, calling for Mark and feeling himself being lifted from here.

The last thing he sees is a confused face of his counterpart and bright summer sun outside the window.

##  9 Let It Die / Satellite

 

He hears Taeyong’s screaming voice as soon as he enters the Room.

The panic so great comes over him that he forgets how to move for a second. But then Taeyong screams again, and suddenly the space is a blurry shape in the corner of his vision as he runs across the room to his lover.

Taeyong is leaning against a blue door on the floor, surrounded by people, and Ten completely disregards the warning bells as he falls to his knees and takes Tae’s face in his hands.

‘What’s wrong?’ He screams, desperate to see something in his eyes, but they’re closed, his eyelids red and inflated and his eyelashes wet from tears and blood streaking from his hair.

‘He just appeared,’ comes a trembling voice from behind and he turns around for a split second and then back at Taeyong just to whip his head back.

Another Taeyong is standing a few feet away from them, his face frightened and his hands gripping his shaking shoulders. It takes Ten a second too long to realize that he is his Taeyong. He makes a whimpering sound and looks back at the injured boy in his hands.

‘Hello,’ he says softly. ‘Can you speak?’

‘Chai?’ Taeyong asks weakly, struggling to open his eyes. Suddenly, he opens his mouth wide and screams again. Ten looks down at his body and sees the weirdest thing — it’s like parts of Taeyong go in and out of the reality, and at some points he can see his bones and organs, and at some — nothing at all.

He chokes up and kisses his forehead on instinct.

‘I’m not him, I’m sorry,’ he whispers, realizing that he’s crying himself. It feels like his heart is on fire inside an acid vessel, because seeing Taeyong, any Taeyong, in this wrecked state and not being the one he so desperately needs makes him want to scream out himself.

‘But you are,’ Taeyong sobs. His hands go up to grip Ten’s wrists. ‘Never forget who you are, please.’

Mark kneels down beside them and puts his hand on Ten’s shoulder.

‘I don’t know how he’s still holding but he won’t be here long. He’s already splitting,’ he whispers urgently. ‘I can’t help him but you can.’

‘How?’ Ten pleads helplessly. ‘I’ll do anything, just tell me.’

He’s still looking at Taeyong’s pained face, so he doesn’t know how Mark looks but it takes another scream and split from Taeyong for him to finally speak out.

‘You need to let him go.’

‘What?’ He whips his head around, inspecting Mark’s face, trying to understand what he’s playing at. ‘We need to get him to his Ten, I have no fucking clue what’s going on.’

Mark scrunches up his face and goes to answer, but then there’s a hand on Ten’s cheek and he looks at Taeyong, whose eyes are open wide and more clear than he’s seen them in the past few minutes.

‘What would you choose?’ He asks, his voice clear and so loud it seems to ring out in Ten’s mind.

Again with the choice. Why are people around him so obsessed with making him clear up someone else’s mistakes? Why is he the one who has to figure out where Chai went wrong? He’s not him. They have the same face but they are different people who had different lives, and even if he knew what was going on inside Chai’s heart, he still wouldn’t be able to own up to his choices.

He looks at his Taeyong. Wouldn’t he, though? If he was faced with a decision that could save Taeyong, would he make it, even without knowing all the facts? He hasn’t touched him in months yet his heart always knows whom it belongs to, and his soul is one with the man that is looking pleadingly at him now. He searches for some kind of answer in his eyes, but they’re closed off from him, and so full of pain it makes him wonder if he feels what the injured Taeyong is going through now. He chokes on a sob. Turns back to Tae on the floor. Wipes the blood from his forehead, leaving a messy dirty trail on his hair.

‘I would always choose you,’ he whispers, sure that this is the right answer. Even if he knew what Chai did, he would always choose Taeyong.

_ You should’ve chosen... _

He completely forgot about the words that Chai had spoken to him. What was the ending? Is Ten right? Did he choose what he had to?

As he watches on as red lights appear on Taeyong’s skin, he begins to think that he might’ve made a mistake. Taeyong isn’t in pain anymore, if the peaceful expression of his eyes is something to go by. They are sad, though, so sad it’s comically tragic.

_ ‘You should’ve chosen the world _ ,’ Taeyong says evenly, his voice booming through the Room.

Ten makes a whining sound, desperate to ask why, to question, to know, but he doesn’t have the time. Like Chai went out in the shower of sparks, Taeyong now is going aflame, the fire spreading from his hands to his chest, and, lastly, to his beautiful face.

‘I love  _ you _ ,’ he calls out in agony but it’s too late.

The last thing he sees is a soft smile that seems so agonizingly familiar that he feels dizzy. The string of memories of this exact smile, of this Taeyong, come rapidly through his head but they’re too fast for him to see something beside the blinding love he sees in the curve of his lips and the feeling of utter content coming through his soul.

And then, he burns out in the blink of an eye, and there’s nothing.

Ten looks at the ashes on his hands and thinks about the way Chai and Tae left differently. Chai had left nothing but darkness and emptiness in his wake, and Tae left with a smile.

He screams.

##  10 Dark on Me / Frequency

He screams until his throat is raw and there are no more tears inside him to shed.

‘Why?’ He pleads, his hands over his eyes, and he’s tilting from side to side, trying to battle the overpowering devastation that seems to be eating him alive. ‘Why does it hurt so bad?’

‘Because you love him.’

He knows the voice is Taeyong’s, he knows every little part of it, yet he doesn’t want to believe it. He can’t love the Taeyong he never knew. He knows he just said it to him, but it seemed like someone else was talking instead of him, like Chai had somehow appeared in his mind to get his last message to his dying lover.

He feels small hands encircle his form, and the pain and devastation slowly subside, leaving only content emptiness.

‘I’m really sorry, Tennie,’ Jungwoo whispers, his cheek pressed to Ten’s shoulder. ‘I’m sorry you couldn’t save him.’

He senses someone kneeling beside him and smells a summer breeze.

‘You know,’ Lucas says in his deep yet so childlike voice. ‘I always wondered why you wouldn’t give up the project if you loved him so much.’

‘What?’ He slowly raises his head to looks at Lucas, and for the first time in the past few months they’ve spent together, Ten gazes into his eyes and realizes that Yukhei doesn’t belong in this universe.

This thought is sobering and shocking, and he gasps, suddenly terrified. He is overcome by the feeling of guilt so great he can’t breathe, and if it weren’t for Jungwoo still controlling his emotions, he’d probably have a panic attack right about now.

Lucas smiles.

‘Ah, don’t freak out, it’s almost over now.’

And he stands up and walks away to wonder at the black door Ten had come through just a few minutes ago. Ten is gasping for air trying to wrap his head around everything that’s happening, and there’s a feeling like someone built a wall in his head and now it’s crumbling under the pressure of someone bumping their fists from the other side.

‘Listen.’ It’s Mark, standing beside the blue door where the ashes still lay at his feet. ‘This is the last one.’

‘Last one what?’ Ten wonders, furious. He disentangles himself from Jungwoo’s arms and stands up to walk up to Mark and maybe punch him, but Johnny’s hand stops him before he can even raise his fist. He looks up and into Johnny’s eyes, his lips pursed together in anger.

‘Last trip,’ Mark enunciates, putting his hand on Ten’s wrist. ‘I promise you, you’ll see everything after this.’

‘Just tell me the full truth,’ he pleads, and all the fight comes out of him, and he’s suddenly so, so drained. ‘Please.’

Mark frowns, and his golden eyes wander like he’s searching for an answer in all the timelines he’s looking at.

‘I needed you to see what Chai had,’ he says finally, and there’s some hidden meaning in his voice that Ten is almost sure he can decipher if he listens close enough. ‘What he did. What he became. What he could have.’

It makes sense. He saw it all. He saw Taeyong, happy to see his boyfriend in their shared home. He saw Chai breaking through the barriers of realities only to destroy Ten’s own world. He saw a broken man, devastated by the guilt and destruction he caused, weeping in the darkness. He saw a happy man, unaware of what he could become if his life had been more unfortunate, with all the opportunities still open for him, with his mind set to have only what he could handle.

‘But why? Why would I need to see his mess?’ He wonders, his voice broken and exhausted.

‘Because now you need to see what he chose,’ Mark answers, and his hand is on the handle of the door where Taeyong had burned away.

He wipes at his face and turns to his Taeyong, wishing to give up everything he could just to hold him for at least a moment.

‘I need you so much,’ he breathes out and sees Taeyong flinch. There are tears streaming down his face, and he’s clutching at his shirt with his trembling fingers. He takes a deep breath.

‘I need my Ten too,’ he answers, and it’s wrong, no, it’s not supposed to be this way. ‘That’s why we need to open that door.’

Ten wants to ask, plead, scream, demand the answers that everyone around him seems to possess yet there’s nothing he can do that won’t involve more confusion. He touches his forearms where the burns are still evident on his skin and takes a whimpering breath.

‘Fine.’ He turns back to Mark. ‘But this is the last one.’

He thinks absentmindedly that this was supposed to be a savior mission. They were supposed just to reverse the world ending, not make him question everything that he has inside his mind. Well.

‘I promise.’ Mark nods and opens the door.

##  11 Monster / Antigravity

They’re in the same lab as the one they witnessed the explosion at, but Ten can already see it’s a different reality. There’s virtually no indicators, but he feels it. Doesn’t try to explain it.

‘The same way,’ Johnny says quietly, and they enter the same observatory they’d been to before. Ten notices that the sign of the project  _ ‘Limitless’  _ is a much shinier one. Somebody must really care about it.

When they enter the room, the lights are already on, and Ten isn’t surprised when he looks into the lab and sees Mark and Chai arguing. The familiar machine is also here, but it’s dead now. He comes closer and listens intently. He’s here to figure it all out, and he’ll be damned if he misses a word.

 

‘It’s not working,’ Chai behind the glass says, and it sounds so agonizing Ten feels it himself. ‘We made a mistake somewhere.’

‘No.’ The older version of Mark comes closer to Chai, leaning so that their faces are aligned. ‘There’s just no one out there. It’s just us.’

Chai screams in rage and stands up, kicking the big silver monitor as if it will erase the verdict. There’s a line across and nothing else. Ten feels like there supposed to be something else.

‘It can’t be. It’s impossible.’ Chai’s voice is frantic as he circles the room trying to find something to throw. ‘You fucking know we’re not the only one reality, then why can’t we find them?’

He’s hysterical, sobbing and screaming, and Ten sees Taeyong reach out, putting his hand on the glass as if he could help Chai by touching him. It creates some trembling feeling inside of Ten, and he remembers his meeting with this world’s Taeyong, and he remembers him dying in his hands.

It makes him wonder again about all the things that have been coming through his head since he first stepped foot in the Room.

Is it the same? Are they the same people, or something changes between the worlds? Does he really exist alone, or is his consciousness made up of hundreds of different Ten’s? Does he love all the Taeyong’s, or is he in love with only his, his special Tae, his one and only?

It seems right and not right at the same time. He loves his Taeyong, and he loved the Taeyong he met in the same way, with the same fierceness, maybe even— Maybe, even more.

‘Oh my god,’ he whispers.

He thinks about Chai in the black room.

_ ‘You fucked up.’ _

_ ‘We did.’ _

He knew the pain Chai felt, knew it so intimately that he was disgusted by it. Disgusted by himself.

He thinks about Taeyong, dying and pleading for Ten to make the right choice, and seeing  _ him _ , and  _ knowing _ .

_ ‘I’m not him, I’m sorry.’ _

_ ‘But you are. Please never forget that you are.’ _

Yet he forgot, didn’t he? Built a wall in his own mind to block it all out, maybe not intentionally, but still trying to make himself look at it all from the outsiders perspective and  _ understand _ .

Something backfired when Johnny made the  _ Limitless  _ machine blow up, and Chai got sent back to his own Doorway, and something horrible happened to him before he ended up in the black room. He saw the destruction he’d brought upon, and something inside his obsessed soul finally realized that he’d done enough. And so he locked himself in his own shame and mistakes, to try and forget, and to wait for someone to come along to fix his mistakes.

He disappeared when Ten met him. But where did he go? Did he disintegrate completely, or did his mind travel to the point in time and place where the person he could be was holding his lover’s hand, the proposal words on the tip of his tongue?

Ten feels Chai inside him. Slowly gaining power. Reclaiming his body and mind, finally waking up from he slumber he put himself in, taking control of the soul he hid himself in while the man who could fix it all was learning what exactly went wrong.

Ten looks at the man behind the glass and realizes something.

_ When the world ended, not three, but four things happened. As Taeyong was burning, Ten, in his desperation and confusion and his desire to somehow help his loved one, hadn’t noticed the simple fact of his own death. _

He looks at Mark, and the way his eyes are studying Ten’s face tells him that he’s right.

‘It’s me. It was all me.’

He turns to look at himself behind the glass, and he sees it now — it’s him.

He’s not made up of different parts. He’s him. Only him.

And now it all makes sense.

‘Please,’ Ten behind the glass sobs. ‘We need to find the way. I need to— I need to find something.’

‘Ten,’ his Mark tells him, putting his hand on his shoulder. ‘It’s impossible. We tried everything. We even tried to anchor it to the people with abilities, but there’s no one in the multiverse. It’s just us, and Johnny.’

Chai laughs bitterly, and it sends shivers down everyone’s spine.

‘Oh, but not really, is it?’ He turns to Mark, and his face is mad. ‘Johnny’s not like us, he’s not even human.’

Mark’s face changes, and now it’s mad too. Ten looks at the scene with the sense of dread. Something deep inside of him knows what’s coming, and he needs to stop it.

‘He has a heart. And mind. And he feels,’ Mark grits through his teeth, his grip on Chai’s shoulder tightening. ‘He’s as real as you and I.’

‘No, he’s a fucking machine you built so that you wouldn’t be lonely,’ Chai almost screams, and Johnny beside him breathes out. It’s not angry, just annoyed. ‘You have him, and of course, you don’t care if the machine works!’

It’s silent, and Ten observes his counterpart and Mark breathing heavily. Mark is looking at Chai with suspicion, and he seems to fight with himself.

Ten knows what he wants to ask. He fucking knows. And he wishes he didn’t.

Lucas and Jungwoo aren’t here anymore.

‘Where—’ he starts, looking at Mark.

‘You’re making a decision,’ Mark explains. ‘And we all will cease to exist once you make it, no matter what you choose.’

He looks into the lab again.

Mark’s decided. He asks. Ten mouths his question because he knows this conversation.

He’s had it before.

‘Did you want to bring him back?’

Chai closes his eyes with a soft exhale. The tears had stopped, but his face is scrunched up. His sobs are agonizing.

‘I made him go away, and I thought— I thought if I found another world like this, if I found the one he’s in, I’d fix this.’

‘But there are no other worlds.’

‘No. There are.’ Ten clenches his fists. ‘I’d already found them. And I— I did something to them. That’s why he left.’

‘What?’ Mark whispers with dread.

Ten looks at Taeyong. Wrong one. He’d found him after all, but at what price?

Taeyong’s eyes are full of tears. He’s looking at Ten, and the lines of his face are blurry.

‘You knew?’ Ten asks, quietly, his throat dry. ‘Mark told you while I was out when we all met?’

Taeyong swallows and nods.

‘I suspected even before he came along,’ he whispers. ‘You were my Ten, but at the same time not. At first, I thought it was the power that changed you, but then I noticed the way you looked at me.’

He keeps disappearing. Ten’s throat burns. How does he keep him here? How does he keep him alive? Why does it feel like he’s been trying to do it for ages? Why is he so tired of trying to hold on to Taeyong?

‘You looked at me like you loved me by default,’ Taeyong says. His hair starts changing color like someone’s switching the tabs very fast. Ten knows what it is because He in the lab spent his whole life studying the multiverse. Dozens of Taeyongs are appearing, trying to make this one stay. They’re failing. ‘My Ten always loved me like he was surprised. But you— you were sure.’

It doesn’t make any sense, and yet it does.

‘I love you,’ he says, but it sounds so weak and pathetic he wants to scream. ‘Always.’

‘I know.’ Taeyong smiles, and it’s the same one Ten fell in love with. Taeyong’s smile is the same in every timeline. That he knows for sure. ‘I love you, too. But I’m not the one for you, sunshine.’

He reaches out, and Ten doesn’t even think about taking his hand away. He takes Taeyong's palm, and nothing happens apart from his breath being taken away.

‘I’m not yours,’ Taeyong repeats. ‘That’s why you couldn’t touch me.’

But now he’s all of them. His hair and his clothes and his lips change yet the mind behind his eyes are the same, and the soul is one.

Ten was wrong — they’re not made up from parts of their other forms. They’re all different.

But love is universal.

‘Don’t make the mistake again, Ten,’ Taeyong asks.

His hand fades away, and his body disappears yet Ten knows he’s still here. He can hear his voice.

_ ‘I’ll meet you on the other side.’ _

The argument behind the glass is still going, but Ten doesn’t listen to it. He keeps looking at the place Taeyong was just seconds ago. He didn’t save him. He was too late, again.

There are memories inside his head, of how it used to be. He sees them through the flames in his mind — he sees himself in the lab coat, he sees Taeyong with his head in some wires, and he sees them looking at each other and knowing they’ve finally met. It’s still blurry, but he knows it — they met and fell in love in these labs, and then something went wrong.

‘What have I done?’ He whispers and turns to Mark. He looks blurry and Ten fears that he’s about to disappear, too, but then he blinks, and those are just tears in his eyes.

Johnny is gone.

‘You tried to save the only good thing you’ve ever had,’ Mark says. He looks so tired. ‘And instead, you destroyed everything.’

He takes his hand, and it’s glowing. Something akin to panic arises in Ten.

‘What are you doing? I thought this was the last one, we should fix everything,’ he says, hysterically, because he can’t go, not yet, he has to, he has to— What?

The room starts spinning, and in two seconds they’re in the Room again. And they’re alone this time. Ten looks at the place on the floor, still covered in ashes, where he found Taeyong ages ago. It was probably just minutes.

‘I fucked up, you know?’ Mark says. His back is turned to Ten, and he’s hugging himself so tightly his fingers leave marks on his shoulders. ‘I wasn’t there for you, Chai.’

He turns around, and Ten remembers everything.

 

/

 

_ ‘The boy keeps electrocuting everything he touches. It’s not normal.’ _

_ The woman is evil, Ten knows. He’s still small, that’s what they tell him because he’s only four yet he already knows she’s bad. She keeps tying him up. He wishes he could make her disappear with his touch. Funny lights only hurt her but don’t make her go away. He wishes he was stronger. _

 

_ / _

  
  


_ ‘Hi. I’m Mark. They say you’re like me.’ _

_ Ten is eleven now, and the boy looks about eight, so it means it’s the boy who’s like him, not the other way around. He still ignores him, though, even if the urge to correct him is strong. He keeps working on his apparat. _

_ ‘What are you building?’ _

_ ‘A machine. To take me away from here.’ _

_ Mark giggles, and that makes Ten look up. He doesn’t like people laughing at him even if they don’t do it often. They’re usually too scared. _

_ ‘To the other time?’ Mark asks, still smiling. ‘I can help! I control the time.’ _

_ Ten looks closer. The boy’s eyes are glowing. He gets him. _

_ He pushes the chair near him closer to Mark. _

_ ‘Sit down, then.’ _

 

_ / _

 

_ They’ve graduated and work in the most proficient lab in the country, and it’s still not enough. _

_ ‘We’re doing everything right,’ Mark says one night when they’re hunched on the couch of their shared apartment. ‘But we can’t make the calculations fast enough. We need help.’ _

_ Ten frowns. He hates other people messing in their business, but it seems they don’t have a choice. _

_ ‘What are you suggesting?’ _

_ Mark pulls out that notebook Ten noticed he always carries with him. He opens it on the first page, and Ten sees calculations upon calculations, drawings upon drawings. _

_ The notebook is titled ‘Johnny’. _

 

_ / _

 

_ Johnny looks exactly like they imagined, and even better, and he seems like a real person. In a way, he is because they took the consciousness and the face of the dying man, rebooted it and put it into the Android body. Mark looks at him like he’s everything. Ten admits that he’s useful. Mark frowns. Johnny performs the calculations that take them weeks in seventeen seconds, and he’s content with it. _

 

_ / _

 

_ ‘Subject 116?’ _

_ ‘Yep, that’s me. Name’s Wong Yukhei, but people usually call me Lucas.’ _

_ ‘Interesting. And why you’re here?’ _

_ ‘Well, I saw your ad and figured I could, I don’t know, give you my input?’ _

_ ‘And how exactly?’ _

_ ‘I can do funny things with wind. I’m not the Storm from the X-Men, but I can bring it if I’m angry enough.’ _

_ ‘Interesting.’ _

_ ‘You’ve said it twice already. Do you think I’m applicable for your program?’ _

_ ‘You’re not exactly what I’m looking for, but you can be useful.’ _

_ ‘Cool. Where do we start?’ _

 

_ / _

 

_ ‘Hello, subject 120.’ _

_ ‘Hi.’ _

_ ‘Why are you here?’ _

_ ‘Because you’re desperate.’ _

_ ‘Excuse me?’ _

_ ‘You’re looking for something but it’s been one hundred and nineteen people, and, alas.’ _

_ ‘Are you telepathic?’ _

_ ‘No. Just extremely empathic.’ _

_ ‘I see. We can use you.’ _

_ ‘I know. I’m Jungwoo, by the way.’ _

_ ‘Nice to meet you, Jungwoo.’ _

_ ‘Feels good to know you’re not lying. Nice to meet you too, Doctor.’ _

 

_ / _

 

_ ‘Subject 127, state your name.’ _

_ ‘Lee Taeyong.’ _

_ ‘Your age?’ _

_ ‘23.’ _

_ ‘The reason of your stay here?’ _

_ ‘I’m having dreams that feel so real I can’t tell the reality and the fantasy apart anymore.’ _

_ ‘Is that it?’ _

_ ‘No. I can... I can burn things if I concentrate. And they don’t turn to ashes, it’s like they disappear into nothingness.’ _

_ ‘Would you say they travel into another dimension?’ _

_ ‘I’ve never thought about it like that. But you may be right. It makes sense.’ _

_ ‘Why?’ _

_ ‘Sometimes I see things. Entrances. They’re everywhere. You just need to know where to look.’ _

_ ‘Good.’ _

_ ‘Is it, really?’ _

_ ‘Trust me, it is. My name is Ten, and if you show me where to look, I will bring you back your reality.’ _

 

_ / _

 

_ Taeyong’s sleeping face is the most peaceful Ten’s seen it since they met. He looks through the glass at how his lips part and he exhales softly. He’s gorgeous. _

_ Ten is not an idiot, and he knows the exhilaration he felt when he first saw him wasn’t just his scientific curiosity. He knew, somehow, that something extremely important has led Taeyong here, has planted the prophetic dreams into his mind, has told him to come here. _

_ Taeyong recognizes him, he thinks, but isn’t confessing. From what Ten can guess, he probably saw him in his dreams. _

_ Taeyong’s dreams. Or are they? Are they just the fiction of his subconscious, or are they the doorway to the thing Ten is so desperately looking for? Thousands of realities, all intertwined but all so different from each other. He’s studied Taeyong’s brain with everything he could, and he’s trying not to let his eagerness to be right cloud his judgment, but he’s positive Taeyong is the entrance Ten has been looking for. If only he could figure out how to use it without hurting him. _

_ Because here’s the thing — no matter how little he cares about people around him apart from Mark, no matter how ready he is to use everything to reach his goal, he could never hurt Taeyong. The boy refuses to leave his thoughts, and the rare moments he gets to touch his hand are so precious to him he wants to run away. Would Taeyong agree to be with a man that keeps trying to escape? Would he escape with him? Is Ten brave enough to ask? _

_ His thoughts are interrupted by a sudden scream. Taeyong is awake now, clutching his blanket and gasping for air. _

_ Ten disregards the rules he set for himself and opens the door, running to Taeyong’s side. _

_ ‘What’s wrong?’ He asks, angry at his own voice for sounding so weak and gentle. He brings his hands to Taeyong’s face, hovering over his cheek and asking for permission. _

_ Taeyong grabs his palm and squeezes it so hard it hurts. He looks into Ten’s eyes, and it seems like his mind is so far away from here he doesn’t even realize where he is. _

_ ‘I saw you,’ he whispers. There are tears in his eyes that refuse to spill over. ‘You were dying, and I knew I had to save you, but I didn’t have the tools. I carried you somewhere, and there were people, and— I don’t know why I needed to save you, you were a stranger in some alleyway.’ _

_ Ten frowns. It must’ve been one of the realities. _

_ ‘And you were you, but at the same time—’ He cuts himself off. ‘Orpheus. Calais.’ _

_ Greek mythology? That’s new. He tries to make sense of Taeyong’s words but, as usual, it’s hard. Every time he thinks he’s understood how to decipher his words, there’s something new. _

_ ‘Well, I’m me. Only me. And I promise never to forget it.’ _

_ ‘You called me an angel,’ Taeyong says. It’s so quiet Ten almost misses it but when he looks up he sees that Taeyong’s gaze is focused now. Ten smiles. _

_ ‘That’s because you are.’ _

 

_ / _

 

_ Taeyong’s hands are shaking, and he can’t calm down. _

_ ‘What have you done?’ _

_ He sees the realities through the tear, and they’re changing so fast he feels dizzy. Ten smiles. _

_ ‘I made us a reality.’ _

_ And then there are screams so devastating and loud he feels his ears pop. It hurts so much as if he’s dying thousands of times over. _

 

_ / _

 

_ ‘I can’t do this anymore.’ His voice is trembling, and his face looks wrong on the digital picture. Ten touches his cheek with his fingers but it’s only the computer screen. ‘Don’t think me a coward for doing this through the video that’s not even live. Well, maybe I am a coward. I just know that if I look at you I won’t be able to leave you. I love you, Ten, but what you did— You cracked the universe. I asked you to stop yet you kept going. I keep hearing the screams that are not my own but have my voice. Some Taeyong out there is dead because of you. Some Ten. Some world. You were so obsessed with finding the reality where you can fit in that you didn’t notice that you already could have everything. Me. Mark. Johnny. Lucas. Jungwoo. We’re your family but you kept looking for something else. And I don’t think I can see you anymore. You had a choice, sunshine, between me and fantasy. Between keeping safe all the realities out there, and having them all. You should’ve chosen the world you already have, Ten. I love you. Goodbye.’ _

 

_ / _

 

_ ‘That’s why he left.’ _

_ ‘What?’ Mark whispers with dread. ‘You did what?’ _

_ ‘I opened the rift.’ Ten swallows. ‘But something went wrong, and there was a crack, and we heard screams, and I think some reality disappeared.’ _

_ There’s silence. He doesn’t want to look up because he can’t face his best friend hating him. _

_ ‘I was hoping to find it again, and maybe fix it, but— it doesn’t exist anymore,’ he whispers. Looks up. ‘But now that you’re here we can use your power to turn it all back around.’ _

_ ‘No.’ _

_ ‘What?’ _

_ ‘I said no.’ Mark’s jaw is set. ‘We’re not messing with it anymore. I thought we can do some good but you fucking lied to me.’ _

_ ‘Don’t you understand?’ Ten grabs his shoulders and turns him to the monitor. ‘There’s is supposed to be thousands more of these. We need to find the one I broke and fix it.’ _

_ ‘Why?’ Mark asks, and his voice sounds bitter. ‘Tell me why.’ _

_ ‘So he can forgive me,’ Ten whispers. It’s still hard to think about Taeyong, but he needs to remember his goal. ‘So I can find him.’ _

_ ‘What?’ Mark turns around, his tired face disbelieving. ‘Find him where?’ _

_ ‘He came back a week ago,’ Ten grits out. It hurts even thinking about it yet he does. He needs to tell the only person that always stood by him the truth. ‘His pass to the lab still worked, so he sneaked into here and talked Lucas and Jungwoo into destroying the  _ Limitless.’ _ He’s looking at her now, and the project of his life, and he hates her. ‘But I couldn’t let them, I tried to— I tried to stop them.’ _

_ ‘And what happened?’ Mark asks like a teacher would patiently ask a student about the mistake he’d made. About the thing he'd fucked up. _

_ ‘It took them. First the boys, and Taeyong did something, he— he tried to direct the machine, and it sent them somewhere but took him as a price. I don’t know where he is.’ He sobs again and covers his mouth. ‘I didn’t even say goodbye.’ _

_ He can feel the tears coming as he remembers it all  _ — _ Taeyong’s disappearing face and the screams that could be his, or Tae’s, or all the people’s he’d destroyed. _

_ ‘I need to find him and bring him back. I need him to see I’m not evil.’ _

_ Mark pushes his hands away, his face angry and his eyes glowing brighter than Ten has ever seen. _

_ ‘You selfish idiot! What about the people you destroyed? What about the reality you wiped out? Don’t you want to give them back their lives?!’ He screams, and Ten is scared of him for the first time in his life. ‘All my life I had to listen to you whine about how unfair everything is, and how you wish you had a chance to make it even with the world. I kept shrugging it off, kept justifying you, kept thinking you had a reason to be angry  _ — _ your parents abandoning you, everyone being scared of you, and I thought, hell, maybe he wants to do some good. But all you ever wanted to do was fix the fucking fate. I hoped Taeyong would change you but even he couldn’t make something as rotten as you good!’ _

_ Ten wants to punch him or zap him with electricity but something behind Mark makes him stop. The machine whirs to life as Mark’s anger fuels his power. The line on the screen turns to two, then to seven, then to thirty, as it keeps multiplying. Ten sees the familiar shift in the air, and he smiles. He did it. He’ll fix it. _

_ ‘Thank you, Mark,’ he whispers. He can see the outlines of some room with doors inside of it. That’s new, but he feels that’s exactly what he needs. Mark whips around and sees it too. He comes closer trying to close it, but it’s out of his control now. _

_ ‘I’ll find him,’ Ten says. He feels hypnotized. The room begs him to enter it. He touches the rims of the entrance, and they entice him. ‘I’ll find him and make him see.’ _

_ ‘What?’ Mark’s voice is weak in his ears, and he smiles. _

_ ‘That I choose him. _ ’

 

/

 

He blinks, and the setting is the same — the Room and Mark. Yet he’s different.

‘I still made the wrong choice, didn’t I?’ He says. ‘I loved him so much, I still do, yet I never deserved to be with him.’

‘I went after you.’ Mark nods. ‘But I always arrived too late. The Doorway existed only for you, it showed the infected realities only to you. Maybe, because your mind created them. When you opened it for the first time, you broke off a branch, and only these few realities were accessible to you. I had to create a separate Room for myself and Johnny, and it drained me so much that you’d already traveled half of them by the time I could follow. And I still had to find you.’

Ten looks at the charred black door. The one he found himself behind, broken, enslaved by himself. Regretful.

‘That’s the one I destroyed the first time?’

He thinks he can feel the pain coming from it. Millions of lives — gone. Because of him.

‘Yes. I never asked — what was behind the door inside? You somehow blocked it from me.’

‘It was me being happy.’ Ten shrugs thinking about the smiling man and biscuits. ‘I never got together with Taeyong. Worked on the project but wasn’t so obsessed with it. For Lee, it’s scientific curiosity, not the escape.’

He remembers something else. The memories are coming back to him, and he suddenly realizes he knows why the door was white.

‘It’s holding the time disease away. I made it a gatekeeper,’ he mumbles.

He looks around. The doors are disappearing, but there’s still a crack in the wall above the black door, and he can see thousands of other doors in it. The crack is getting bigger by the second.

‘The infection is spreading, Ten. These worlds are already beyond saving. Do you see what you did wrong?’

He’s silent. He looks back at the moment everything changed.

The world had ended in three points.

First, the darkness came.

Johnny tried to destroy the machine that the Mark who spent his life without Ten was building. It pushed Ten out of the reality and destroyed itself.

Second, the world exploded.

Chai had exploded after letting himself see what became of him and came back to the point it all happened.

Third, Taeyong went aflame.

Ten followed his light to find peace, and it destroyed everything.

‘What happened to other me?’ He asks. Points to his forehead. ‘I still feel like I’m him. All the memories and feelings, they’re here. But I also know that I’m really the Ten from the labs.’

‘It’s the same as with me,’ Mark says. His voice starts to fade. ‘I think your power was too strong for the mind to survive, but it merged with yours. He exists yet he doesn’t. I think he’s disappearing now too, but you still remember him.’

He does. He remembers everything, but he feels it’s starting to go away like someone is erasing letters from the board. He remembers Taeyong with painful clarity, though.

‘I’m going, too,’ Mark says. Ten sees his hand starting to disappear. ‘It took so long because I have two minds, and I’m also still behind that door, trying to stop you. If I succeeded and closed the rift, nothing would have happened. Now the only choice is to close it even though the world will still disappear. Disintegrate. Perhaps, it will spread out through the still healthy multiverse. Perhaps not. It goes beyond my knowledge.’

Ten looks at the only door that’s still clear and sharp. He knows what he needs to do.

‘Won’t it create a paradox?’ He asks one last question. ‘Me stopping the same me if I didn’t do it the first time around?’

‘Paradox would be our best option, but I doubt there’s still enough reality for it.’

Only his face is now visible, and Ten thinks about the Cheshire Cat. Alice fucked up. He fucked up. He always thought he’s more of a Mad Hatter. He needs to sew this shit shut.

‘What do I do?’

There’s only a faint glow where Mark used to be but it’s not like with Taeyong — he’s gone for good.

‘What do I do?’ He repeats to himself. The door starts cracking. If he doesn’t go in now, everything will collapse, and it will keep collapsing until there’s nothing left.

_ You should’ve chosen the world. _

He closes his eyes, listening to the memory of Taeyong.

 

He opens the door.

 

##  12 Last to Fall / Die for You

‘What?’ Mark’s voice is weak in his ears, and he smiles.

‘That I choose him.’

‘Dumbass.’

Chai whips around, alerted by a third voice, his hand almost inside the machine. He sees himself, and the little voice in his head, the one sounding suspiciously like Taeyong, (which hurts, it always does), wants to make a Terminator joke.

‘Hey,’ Ten waves his hand tiredly and turns to Mark. His face is scared but he isn’t disappearing, just frowning, his head tilted. Ten sighs. No paradox, then. What a pity. It would save him so much trouble.

‘For what it’s worth, I’m sorry,’ he smiles weakly. This Mark doesn’t know what he’s talking about, but he’ll see in a second. ‘You should go to Johnny. I’ll take it from here.’

Mark’s eyes are glowing, and Ten waits patiently for him to see everything. He notices for the first time how uninvasive Mark’s power is. He doesn’t feel its presence, just a soft soothing aura that belongs not to it but to Mark himself. From the first time they met back at the orphanage, Mark has been the support Ten’s obsessed mind needed, that stability and comfort he always reached out to when things got too hard. Ten is a horrible friend but without Mark, he’d have never become the man he is today. He smiles, thinking that he’ll miss his best friend.

‘Holy shit,’ Mark whispers when he’s done looking through his memories, and Ten chuckles darkly.

‘You don’t say. Now go.’

Mark nods and leaves but not before turning to look at him again.

‘I forgave you, you know,’ he says softly.

Ten knows what he means, and it makes him feel surer of what he’s about to do. He waits until Mark is gone, and comes closer to  _ Limitless _ , putting his hand on her sleek frame. Smiles. He spent his life designing it, and now he wishes he had a big fucking hammer to wipe it away.

‘We fucked up,’ he says to Chai who’s watching him silently. ‘Oh, darling, we fucked up so majorly.’

He doesn’t particularly know why what he’s about to do is going to work, but as Mark had said — there’s not enough reality left for the usual laws to apply.

Ten reaches out and puts his hand on Chai’s cheek.

They travel in his mind together, and he watches again the events unfolding in a rapid yet precise manner.

Chai going into the machine. All the worlds he’d traveled. They both observe the realities he’d traveled, and even those that aren’t among the infected ones, and they see themselves exist and work, love and laugh, travel and sing, learn and fall, and it’s beautiful. The universe is infinite, and even in their desperate crusade they couldn’t help but notice how majestic it is, and both of them, this pathetic small man so concerned with his own broken heart, are nothing but dust.

He shows Chai what happened to him when he made the step Chai is about to repeat now. He shows how his powers kept growing with each reality until he was so charged that his voice sounded like the cracking of electricity. They see all the trips he’d made in pointless attempts to find Taeyong. The ways it kept going wrong. His frustration. His remorse. His death. His attempt to fix everything. The explosion that led him into the mind of Ten.

And then he shows Chai Taeyong. All of them for only second, and then the only one that truly matters. Not the one they’d lost, for they both remember everything about him with such precise clarity it’s ingrained in their souls. No, he shows him the boy he’d met, the boy who traveled with him across the post-apocalyptic world just because he knew something was waiting for them, the boy who felt that his Ten was gone yet still helped the imposter find his way, the boy whose light was so strong that it led a broken man to him. Such a beautiful soul, a kind and brilliant one, caring to a point he loved Chai like one would love the memory of their dead lover. Taeyong’s soul is mesmerizing in the same way all through the universe. Calling like a satellite, bright like a lighthouse, majestic like a Phoenix. The Phoenix that burned because he didn’t belong.

He takes his hand away.

‘I could never let him go,’ Chai whispers with tears in his eyes, yet he’s not trying to justify himself — just states the fact, and Ten smiles because he finally gets it. They both do. It took them several dead worlds and gradually disappearing people to finally see.

And now they’re here, the last to fall, before their final choice.

‘He would save the world.’

Ten isn’t sure which one of them says it. They’re the same person on two sides of one lifetime.

‘It’s Taeyong,’ Ten chuckles. ‘He would fall down from a tree if it meant he could save a kitten.’

They both laugh suddenly, and it feels so nice for the first time in so long that he wants to stay in this moment forever. He can hear the cracks in the air, though, so he turns to the machine.

‘Do you know what we have to do?’ He asks, but it’s just a formality — they built everything. Birthed it through years of calculations and sacrifice. They can surely wreck it.

‘It’s tied to our minds.’ Chai frowns. Ten nods. ‘If we do what you’re suggesting, it can take every version of us from every reality and just—’

‘Consume as fuel.’ Ten nods grimly. ‘But aren’t you forgetting something?’

‘Taeyong.’ Chai says. ‘In the end, it’s always about him.’

If they played it right, if something in their rotten lives had meaning, if they had found someone to love them so much it carried him through death to salvation — they have the chance to survive. If someone is waiting on the other side. If his light is bright enough to have guided Chai’s dying soul to him, perhaps it can lead Ten back into existence.

It ties into Taeyong again but this time it’s different — they’re not running to bring him back. They’re running in the opposite direction, to face the final battle, to finally embrace the fate, to finally fall.

Everything is gone, and they’re here, the last to fall. And after countless attempts and the world of regret, they’re making the right choice.

He takes Chai’s hand. The  _ Limitless  _ feels it, and she whirs louder as if welcoming them as if she knows everything and approves, and she probably does. He built her to have a new beginning, and now, she will become the end.

He turns to Chai.

‘Don’t forget.’

Chai looks at him.

‘Never.’

Together, they take the step, close their eyes, and bring their power upon the machine that was supposed to become his salvation yet ricocheted his intentions at him. They take the leap into the unknown, and then it’s dark.

 

The last thing he hears is laughter.

 

##  13 The Future is Now / Starlight

Ten thinks he can hear a soft singing voice. When he opens his eyes, there’s nobody but him. He frowns.

He feels like he had an extremely vivid dream, yet he cannot remember a thing. His head hurts slightly, and he rubs his eyes. The skin on his forearm is smooth, and he raises his eyebrows to wonder at why he’s surprised by that.

He coughs and stands up. His room hadn’t changed since he went to bed last night. Everything is the same — his bed he always considered too big for one person, his blue curtains that his mom had gifted him when he moved away (he hated them with passion, but couldn’t make himself throw them away), his notes on the new book strewn around where they fell out of his hands when he fell asleep while working (again, honestly, if he had someone who cared about him, they’d punch him for doing this all the time), and his phone, the battery dead because he keeps forgetting to charge it.

Yet, something is missing. He feels like he’d lost something of such great importance that it’s almost a blasphemy not to remember it. He puts his feet on the floor, his knees stiff from spending the night in tight jeans, and notes how soft his carpet feels. It’s always been like this. Why is he noticing it now?

His charger is on the floor, and he sighs, retrieving it and plugging in his phone. He’ll probably have messages from his agent when it comes back to life, but he decides to ignore them for now.

His chest hurts from the inside. He rubs it and coughs again. Is he getting sick? Is the pain physical? Why does it feel like his heart is being pulled somewhere outside, breaking over and over again because it won’t reach its goal, then? He sighs. Fuck. He should take a break from writing, his thoughts on the book are now projecting onto himself.

The coffee tastes the same. He suddenly wishes he had some biscuits even though he never had much taste for them. His cupboards and fridge are empty apart from some Thai leftovers and old cheese that he never eats yet always buys in his four-am-insomnia-fueled shopping trips. His kitchen hadn’t changed overnight, too, but he suddenly wants to hear someone’s voice in here. Singing?

His phones chimes from the next room, indicating that it’s on again, and he counts to four. On the last number, there’s a familiar ringtone, and he rolls his eyes. Predictable.

He takes his time to answer the call. He knows he’s going to be scolded, so sue him for dragging it out. Only when the half of his cup is inside him, does he walk to his bedroom and pick up the phone.

‘Please, don’t scream,’ he warns instead of a greeting. They’re way past such formalities. ‘I have a terrible headache.’

‘You deserve it,’ Jaehyun snorts. ‘When will you start charging your phone regularly?’

‘When there’s someone I actually want to talk to with it.’ Ten shrugs even though his agent can’t see it. ‘What do you want? I’m busy.’

‘I bet my ass you just woke up and didn’t even wash your face. You’re probably still in your yesterday clothes, coffee in your hand, one sock lost somewhere in the outer space,’ Jaehyun drawls out and yawns. ‘Am I right?’

Ten looks down on his feet and yep, one is bare. He sneers. The fucker.

‘Perhapeth,’ he murmurs.

‘Predictable and boring,’ Jaehyun snorts. ‘Anyway. I have a meeting with a publisher for you.’

Ten flops down on his bed, almost disconnecting his phone but jerking at the last second to avoid ripping out the cord like it happened a number of times which is honestly ridiculous. His head explodes with pain again, and the nagging feeling of loss is back. He sighs. His life is a mess.

‘I thought we already had one?’ He wonders and closes his eyes. He wishes he was on the cold floor, but he’s too tired to move there.

‘Yeah, but he’s retiring, and his son is taking over.’ Ten hears rustling on the other end. ‘Mark Lee. He wants to meet his best author.’

‘Oh, really?’ Ten smiles a bit smugly.

‘Yeah, but she was busy, so he’s meeting with you,’ Jaehyun cackles.

‘Asshole,’ Ten clicks his tongue.

‘At least I’m not a single desperate idiot,’ Jaehyun deadpans. ‘Anyway. Meet him at the cafe  _ Limitless  _ in two hours. I’ll text you the address.’

Ten frowns. The name of the cafe brings out something inside his soul, the same pulling and pain, and he rubs his chest again. It’s weird. He wants to cry all of a sudden.

‘Sure,’ he answers absentmindedly.

‘Look decent, please,’ Jaehyun says as a farewell and hangs up.

‘Will do,’ Ten murmurs into nothingness. His mind is still trying to figure out why  _ Limitless  _ is such a familiar sound, yet there’s a big old nothing. Maybe, he’d been there before? He would probably remember, because the name is interesting, and he always notes down such things.

He sighs and closes his eyes again. Hears a clinking sound of the message Jaehyun had probably attached the location in. Two hours. He has plenty of time to recover, then. He should take a shower and comb his hair. The pull inside grows stronger. He thinks he hears singing again. Maybe, it’s someone on the street. He wishes he had at least a cat. He should get up now.

He ends up grabbing a pen and drawing the same smile over and over again for an hour until he rushes into the shower, still unable to complete the drawing and make it perfect, and runs out of his apartment with his hair still wet and his heart, for some reason, screaming.

 

/

 

_ Limitless  _ looks like your usual hipster cafe-bakery. Ten still isn’t sure where he heard the name, but the pain had gotten worse on his way here, so he doesn’t have time to stand and wonder.

The inside is cold and decorated in pastel colors, and Ten likes it. He goes up to the counter and sees a tall boy with his back turned. He’s not in a hurry, and he’s not an asshole, so he just stands there waiting for the boy to notice him.

Pulls out his phone to check the message from Jaehyun who sent him all the information about the man he’s meeting. Like Jae had once put it: ‘for a brilliant writer with annoying attention to detail, you have a terrible memory when it comes to people who sell your work.’

‘Mark Lee,’ he murmurs to memorize.

‘Good man,’ comes a voice from the counter, and Ten looks up to see that the boy is looking at him, his hair pulled back and his hands exposed, showing the string of tattooed wires. ‘He runs this shop.’

‘He’s a publisher,’ Ten frowns. The boy snorts and rolls his eyes.

‘The idiot can’t get enough, I swear,’ he smiles warmly. Ten raises his eyebrows.

‘Isn’t he your boss?’ He wonders. The boy snorts again.

‘Yeah, he’s also my husband.’ he shrugs. ‘I’m Johnny, by the way, and I believe I need to take your order.’

Ten gasps without realizing it while a thought runs across his mind.

_ You have a mind, and you feel. _

He tries to catch it and find where it came from, but it evaporates immediately. Maybe, it’s something he wrote at some point?

‘Nice to meet you, Johnny,’ he says weakly, his insides feeling like they’re on fire. ‘I’m Ten. And I’d like a simple americano, please.’

‘Cool.’’ Johnny nods and smiles. ‘I’ll give your order to the barista. It’s on the house since you’re meeting with Mark and everything.’

Ten bows his head slightly and comes forward to the bar. There’s nobody behind the counter, but he’s content to wait. The weird feeling he experienced upon seeing Johnny still has him rattled. He opens up his notes app to write his thoughts down to maybe use it in his work. He’d found a long time ago that it helps to add as many details of his own reality into his books as he can. It gives them life, and it allows the readers to travel not only the journey of his characters but also his own.

He coughs again and rubs his chest. His heart is beating frantically like he’s running a mile, and he tries to calm down his breathing, yet it’s like he’s falling, unguided and alone.

‘Hi, my name is Taeyong, how can I help you today?’

Ten looks up from his phone, and suddenly the agonizing feeling of loss he couldn’t understand disappears, and his heart calms down, and the world suddenly seems brighter.

The boy behind the counter looks tired and Ten guesses the night shift yet his eyes still glow, and his smile is still soft. His smile. It’s always the same.

Ten breathes out. Smiles. _ Of course _ .

‘Hello, Taeyong. I’m Ten.’

Taeyong’s eyes widen and his lips part in a small gasp. He leans forward almost as on instinct and looks into Ten’s eyes.

Somehow, Ten recognizes his irises.

Taeyong smiles.

‘Finally.’

 

**Author's Note:**

> come yell at me on [twitter ](https://twitter.com/romulusadhara)


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